MODERNHAUS

XII Forever, sometimes

2012-02-13T16:59:00.000-08:00

A wholehearted product recommend from yours truly. I just came home from picking this guy up. I had to have a bunch of girls dig through the stockroom to find me one, but I would not (let them) give up.

My husband was stroking out in the cavernous new two-story Forever 21, but I was undeterred. I combed the racks (hey, why no whole shirts? You can only get half a shirt now?) while his eyeballs jerked around in their sockets.

I bought him soup after, so he's ok now.

Embellished tribal clutch, $26.80. Really.

Much weightier and spendier-looking in person than I had any right to expect.

Yep, this clutch is CLUTCH!

SHOP UPDATES: Milo Baughman recliner, Moroccan rug, and a unique dresser/nightstand

2012-02-10T10:08:00.000-08:00

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Three lovely and unique pieces in the shop now:

A completely refinished/rebuilt/reupholstered Milo Baughman recliner in creamy white:

A fantastic dark walnut modular piece with an extra set of conical legs...combines into a gorgeous highboy as shown, or separates into two smaller chests when extra legs added:

A cool vintage Beni from the estate of a lovely Eastern European couple that traveled the world in their younger years:

MALM Freestanding FIreplace

2012-02-07T13:58:00.000-08:00

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It's the iconic modernist fireplace, right?

I know if I was building or remodeling a Mid Century home, one of these would go smack in the middle and I'd build everything else around it. Besides being the most visually-pleasing fireplace on the market, I've actually heard very good things about the efficiency and heat output of Malm.

This is the Fire Bowl 3 model with porcelain finish in "Slate." I would describe it as a malted chocolate color (a grey-tinged brown). I absolutely love the fat belly of the bowl and tulip-shaped base, which is more unique and less atomic-feeling than the typical cone shape.

Although it is one Malm's original Mid Century designs, they are still in production (bonus-replacement parts and accessories still available!) and this is actually a recent model. From what I understand, this particular model can be installed as close as 8" away from the wall. This is a major consideration if you have a small install space!

Typically these run about $3400, but it's available in the shop now for thousands less.

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NO SHAME

2012-02-05T20:18:00.000-08:00

Look, we spend most of our lives trying to avoid embarrassment. I say, we have better ways to spend our time, so let's not pretend. We are all 'tards in our own way; messed up, broken, neurotic, one foot smaller than the other, one boob drooping more than the other, needy, weird, accident-prone and known to fail at things occasionally.

Here's the thing: if you tell the joke first, if you can laugh at yourself, then the laugh belongs to you. No one else can have it. It makes you powerful. They can laugh with you, but not at you. Unless they see you trip and fall, which will look hysterical as you flail around and go "OHHH!" and land weird. We will all laugh at you then, because we just can't help it. You look so funny!

It helps not to wear wide-legged pants and clogs and run down the street. Just a tip from a pro.

Anyhow, you can laugh at yourself and be a powerful, needy, accident-prone, nerd. Or you can run around trying to hide it, which seems rather tiring but it's your choice.

Occasionally the "You might also like..." feature on Blogger dredges up some real winners from my past.

I thought, hey, why don't we share our most embarrassing Blogger moment with each other? Come on. I promise if we laugh it will be with you, not at you.

My most embarrassing post is not only awful and bizarre, it's also totally TMI (although nowhere near as awkward as my friends above). So without further delay I bring you:

FASHION HAUS

I showed you mine, now show me yours.

I DARE YOU

2012-02-03T08:42:00.001-08:00

Not to do everything you planned to do today, and at least one thing you didn't.

Don't grow old and orderly and silence the wonders of the universe.

Break one of your own rules, or one of theirs. Make sure you can tell the difference.

Oh, you thought I didn't do this anymore?

You're probably a hipster if:

Eventually all your favorite bands make car commercials.

It's ok Little Joy. You speak Portuguese. I still want to kiss you on the mouth.

We're all following someone

2012-01-31T11:01:00.000-08:00

It's just not me.

So follow me on Twitter, where I:

Discuss my family's symphonic fart performances (and now from the horn section!), dismantle the semantic content on tampon packaging, and generally interfere with the status quo in a variety of engaging and quietly disturbing ways.

It's exactly what your hectic life needs.

Follow @modernhaus

.................

At Home with Haus

2012-01-29T14:02:00.000-08:00

Since lifting this sofa like a big dummy, half my body came painfully unhinged from the rest of my body. But that didn't stop me, no sir, from having four teenage boys over. They ate all my food and wedged dirty socks into all the furniture. There are cell phones and iPods charging in every outlet, and I could start a skate shop with the gear they piled in my entry.

They're out now with the Mister, and for some reason I felt like taking pictures. Maybe as a memento of the quiet times?

Morgan took some sweet pictures of my house a while back, but since then there have been some new additions.

Everything in this corner was $5 or less, except the new Target lampshade.

The dining room, post-slumber party. Not too bad, although I do wonder what the hammer was out for? The marble tulip table is a new Craigslist score ($450 if you must know, and if I know you, then I know you must...know). Free of hammer damage as far as I can tell.

You can see a bit of the Franz Kline-inspired painting I did (and still need to frame). Still deciding how to finish the stairs. I'm thinking paint them Hague Blue and install a sisal runner with a chevron weave?

A new piece. Sell? Keep? Keep! No, sell?

Mr. Knightly likes it under the furniture, where giant teenagers can't step on him.

More nook. I love that Deco mirror ($5 at auction), made that cabinet (and was featured on Design*Sponge super way back in the day!), and the oatmeal linen curtains, brass lamp, and antique framed portrait (of a "creepy baby" according to the kids) were thrifted.

There's something charming and slightly Anthropologie-esque about the unfinished stairs, no? Mmmm, no.

These chairs are so old and crusty. I should probably have them swabbed for smallpox.

Rock me like the rock of ages

A new friend for the Danish wall unit, also at the magical price of $5 (I guess at my local AMVETS, when in doubt they put a $4.95 price tag on it?)

I swear I'm going to cut up that rug and wear it, I love the pattern so much.

Doing his "dog on a motorcycle" impersonation.

And you? Fill in the blank: This weekend I __________ !

NO RESOLUTION

2012-01-23T20:48:00.000-08:00

In my life? My out-of-focus photography? To my excessive sweating problem? All of the above?

Yes, probably.

But really I just wanted to talk about goals and avoid the cliche of made-to-be-broken "resolutions". To me a goal is something you actually see yourself accomplishing in a fixed amount of time. A resolution is more of a vague and easily-broken wish. It's socially acceptable, almost expected, that you break your resolutions, but goals are made of weightier stuff.

All these ladies are coming home from ALT Summit with renewed focus on their goals, and I've certainly been thinking about mine.

"Crap dude, now what??"

Do any of you need to crystalize a professional or business goal for the year? Maybe get some support?

In the spirit of ladies (and my BFF Jonathan) supporting each other, what if we all blog about it and post a link in the comments section below? Reading about how others think through their professional issues and address their obstacles could be really eye-opening. Also, I think a big key to realizing goals is accountability and feedback...if we put it out there, have some conversations about it, and check back in with each other once a month, don't you feel much more likely to stay on task?

Maybe your post could answer these questions, sort of interview style:

- What would you like to accomplish in the next 365 days (professional/business/creative)?

-What are your biggest obstacles?

-How will you overcome them?

- What steps do you need to take to accomplish your goal (try to assemble a 1-year timeline)?

Here are my answers:

GOAL:

Hire a graphic designer to develop a logo and website, and move business from eBay (eBay has been good to me, but there's no real brand recognition or development opportunities on eBay...I'm not really "MODERNHAUS" as long as I'm on eBay, rather just another seller).

Establish some sort of physical presence in San Diego, whether through occasional pop-up sales or a storefront.

Write, paid or unpaid, in some professional capacity.

OBSTACLES:

Not taking myself as seriously as I take everyone else. Oh, I can pump you up like a Nike turkey

and send you out the door convinced that you can no longer deprive the world of your talent. I believe in everyone...I really do. Now how to turn that kind of positive energy onto myself?

Not giving myself the resources to grow or improve (time [to write, think, and create a business plan], money, hired help to enable business expansion).

I feel like I really need to think about my timeline and plan to overcome these obstacles, so I'll post those answers in a day or two.

Please post your answers or link to your blog post in the comments section!

FREAKING OUT

2012-01-20T09:40:00.001-08:00

Is it normal to get so excited about ordering one old, used pillow? Probably not. I can't wait to see how it looks on my new (ratty old) black leather Barcelona chair (p.s., the chair and the pillow cost about the same!)

And, possibly way more newsworthy than purchasing a pillow cover is the fact that tomorrow the ridiculously beautiful, recently opened Lautner Hotel lobby:

will become the new home of this piece:

I took a risk on this over-the-top piece, and it paid off. Goes to show you, no guts no Lautner!

Also, hustle your butt over to the shop where these auctions are ending soon:

SUPER CHEAP FLIGHTS between NYC and PORTLAND

2012-01-19T11:33:00.000-08:00

FYI, just in case you woodsy Pendleton-wearing hipsters want to hook up with your gritty urban hipster brethren, flights between PDX and LGA (LaGuardia) are only $122 including tax, and you'll earn full mileage credit, etc. .

Bookable on Orbitz right now, make sure to choose the "+/- 3 days" search option to find the best price. I test-booked through February and there is a lot of availability.

You'll earn approximately 5,000 flight miles on this trip, so please make sure you have (or you open) a frequent flyer account with the airline, and book with a points-earning card! Check your credit cards...you just might have one that gives you more than 1 point per dollar when booking travel (and there are lots that do!)

If you think you want to take advantage of this but aren't sure, book it now and then think about it. Orbitz allows you to cancel within 24 hours.

If you book it, be a pal and come back here and let us know!

Desperately seeking pillow

2012-01-18T10:21:00.000-08:00

Joslyn's photo jogged my memory (p.s., it's the only part of me that jogs).

Remember this Anthropologie pillow? What? You don't commit every Anthropologie item to memory?

When I saw it, I was immediately reminded of this spectacular painting. Someone with incredible taste owns it...oh, if only I could remember who.

photo by Morgan Satterfield

Oh yeah. It's me. Unkempt bed is the giveaway.

It currently hangs over my bed, and I thought, how crazy that there's a pillow that somehow exactly matches this weird color palette and abstracted design.

I'm super not into matching, but these pieces are like separated twins that need to be reunited.

So, if you happen to have the pillow, or you find it in a random clearance bin at Anthro, or you hang out at Joslyn's house and it happens to find it's way into your bag at the end of the night (I suggest you give her a lot to drink and work with another person to create a distraction), I will pay handsomely.

Thanks a bunch.

WILCO TICKETS, Hollywood Palladium LOS ANGELES

2012-01-17T16:58:00.000-08:00

Let's just not even talk about how distraught I am that I can't use these. But you know who's even sadder? Jeff Tweedy. He can't stop thinking about me. He can't believe we won't get to hang out.

See him looking straight at me, like he could just eat me with a spoon? Right??

I have a pair of tickets for the Hollywood Palladium, Tuesday, January 24th, 7pm. They're actual paper tickets from Ticketmaster, with the purchase receipt, etc., just in case you don't trust me yet.

Update: SOLD

WEEKEND GOLD

2012-01-13T15:04:00.000-08:00

These have since sold, but there's more in the shop!

Well hi there! I spent a relaxing morning at the dentist's. No, I'm serious. I got to lay down and it felt SO good. After I twisted my ankle in my stupid Kork-Ease and fell head-first into my new marble tulip table I needed to lay down for a while.

The only problem is I have this super-sweet dentist who says, "Ouch!" just as he's about to do something he thinks is going to hurt me. I appreciate the sympathy but it's so disconcerting. Where do I find these people??

I got $10 balcony tickets for the symphony tonight, a Schumann piano concerto that I love. So there will be more sitting and closing of my eyes, which sounds just perfect (I know, I'm an animal). Besides, the symphony always makes me feel super young. Like, "the old patrons want to pat me on the head" young. IT'S AWESOME.

But this isn't just a link to crazy old posts from my past! No! It's also links to crazy posts about travel!

I wanted to tell you to sign up for TripAlertz here. It's a bargain travel site and it just requires an email to sign up, nothing personal. But the best part is once you join, you'll get a code to invite your friends to join and you'll get a $5 credit for each person that signs up. If you're popular, put up the link on Facebook or Twitter, get 100 people to join, and you'll have enough for a super sweet trip!

Also, did you get gold baby?? I hope you followed the directions I posted here to get instant Gold status at Hilton. Because now Hilton is having three different promotions that you can "stack" or use together to hoard a fat wad of points. No time like now to see what it's like being "elite" at a hotel. Click here for a post that lays out the promotions.

And finally, check out the lovelies in the shop. Place a bid or two. Auctions are fun! And so, so much better than gambling because, hey, if you don't win anything you're also not out any money! However I do NOT serve cocktails to you in a trashy outfit while you bid. So there's that downside...

What kind of merrymaking will you be involved in this long and lovely weekend? Downton Abbey marathon? Going to see The Artist? Laundry? Whatever it is, eat some cheese and enjoy it. Cheers!

Evolution of a diet

2012-01-11T08:54:00.001-08:00

I don't know why this always happens. I'll notice I'm gaining a little weight. That evening, I throw a little going away party for cheese (intimate, just the two of us) by toasting a half-pound of it with two glasses of wine, because TOMORROW I'M NOT GOING TO EAT.

Not TOMORROW I'M GOING TO WALK THREE MILES, or TOMORROW I'M GOING TO EAT 1200 CALORIES. Just, I'M NOT GOING TO EAT.

This is dumb because usually I can drink coffee all morning and just plain FORGET to eat until 3pm, but after these romantic cheese parties and stalwart anti-eating declarations, I wake up DESPERATE TO EAT.

Last night, not only did I have a cheese party, I had a pear custard pie party, a homemade fried chicken party, and a roasted potato party. They partied late into the night in my stomach while I laid in bed and groaned. Clutching my stomach and making delusional resolutions.

This morning, I suspiciously watched half of a breakfast quesadilla go from crispy-flakey-oozey to greasy-heavy-rubbery, it's pointy end following my movements like a compass arrow. The quesadilla had locked on its target and would not let go until it had successfully launched straight onto my butt.

This is when I'M NOT GOING TO EAT turns into YOU HAVE TO EAT SOMETHING, WHY NOT THAT?

And it doesn't really count, because it doesn't even look good anymore and anyhow I didn't even make it for myself.

Essential diet tip of the delusional: OTHER PEOPLE'S FOOD HAS NO CALORIES.

So I heat it up, but really to get it crisp again the pan needs some butter. And really, this is just all fat and carbs and hadn't I better add half an avocado to it? You know, FOR NUTRITION?

This is when I realize what a small little piece it really was. Barely two bites! And I have to use up the other half of the avocado or isn't it going to go bad?

So I have to go now. The memory of crispy, buttery tortilla, creamy avocado and the slight tang of Tapatio sauce is fading from my tongue.

Tonight I will toast my cheese and try again. After all, "In order to succeed you must first be willing to fail," the saying goes.

I am willing. So very willing.

2012-01-10T11:50:00.000-08:00

Guys! Yesterday I was all

Today is more

I mean, right? How accurate is that? So easy to have one bad day and get all dramatic about how your life is in the crapper and your crow's feet are noticeably deeper since yesterday and your friends don't call and didn't I JUST clean this kitchen and my knee is sore so I'm probably getting early-onset arthritis. Maybe cancer even. And no one seems to care.

So I'm ba-a-a-ck. My knee IS sore. I don't know why I'm so tired lately. Likely cancer. Let's kick our problems, real and imaginary, with a big old can of lady whoop-a**.

In the thick of it, and I'm not talking about Greek yogurt

2012-01-09T11:22:00.001-08:00

Turning twelve in Spain...the beginning of the end (there was A LOT of sullen gelato-eating)

I had started this lovely, esoteric post about what we learn from our mothers about music; how this teaches us larger lessons about life, beauty, identity, joy. [Triggered by a sudden memory of my mother, butt-long red hair swaying, belting out Linda Ronstadt in our living room full of ferns and antiques.]

But today is not the day for these musings. Today I'm in the thick of it and all attempts at abstraction and philosophy are crumbling in the face of cold, hard reality. Caving in like Kirstie Alley at a dessert buffet.

I was up with a child who had appendicitis-type stomach pains (or a brilliantly-acted impersonation of them) all night, and so, even when I was finally able to soothe him to sleep, I spent the early morning hours half awake and uneasy. I was ready to run to the ER with my Gene Simmons-smeared makeup. Is it bad that I worried about what I would wear for a 3am ER run? Something warm and comfortable that didn't say, "I am a homeless crack addict"?

Today a sick day gave us time to review school grades and I discovered whole swaths of missing assignments. Apparently when you're a twelve-year old boy your brain can go MIA for days at a time and parents have to send search parties to get it back. There were tears and threats and fist-banging and that was before I even called the kid into my office.

Someone said that a mother can never be happier than her least happy child. I would add to this that mothers cannot have an "A" day if her kid is getting a "D". I don't feel good unless all is well with my children. Fathers are so annoyingly exempt from this torture.

Beyond this, our house feels chaotic. There are balls being dropped. Roles being reversed and then reversed back without warning. Who is responsible for what keeps changing. All I'm sure of today is that my job is to do everything that no one else gets done. I feel like a tractor trawling the sand on the beach for forgotten responsibilities, missed appointments, and unpaid bills.

I feel like the lone fireman in a family of arsonists.

Happy, happy Monday to me.

Click here to read about the last time I faced the infamous 12-year old male species!

SHOP/UPDATE

2011-12-31T12:20:00.000-08:00

Finding a great upholsterer has opened up a whole new world of possibilities. It's great to find things, but to find things and make them WAY MORE AWESOME through the magic of refinishing is where the real fun is. I had these re-done in a heathered charcoal gray cotton velvet/mohair that reminds me of a classic gray flannel suit or felted wool, and the solid tapering legs were re-done in a warm honey tone.

There's something almost Shaker-esque in the simplicity and color palette. I've never seen a pair of chairs that I wanted more than these. And they looked so perfect against my worn old Persian rug, I had to remove them to the warehouse immediately or I knew they'd never leave.

So here they are, better than new and in the shop now.

A really special Danish case piece, ideally proportioned, featuring some of the best craftsmanship I've ever seen on a piece of furniture:

Shop for them here.

RECAP (and obsession confession)

2011-12-29T12:45:00.000-08:00

A reader/friend said I was starting to sound like an extreme couponer with all this travel hacking talk of late. Oh heck no. Finding stellar deals or strategizing to travel for free is one thing. Carrying an accordion binder of 30 cents off coupons in my purse is a whole different ball of crazy wax.

But....I do have a slightly extreme confession to make.

Don't hate. I didn't share this offer here because I didn't know if it was any good. Also because I don't want you guys to think I'm an extreme couponer.

American Express ran a "Gift Chain" promotion recently. You registered your AMEX cards, spent $25+ at any of several online stores, and each purchase won a "gift" ranging from a $5 statement credit to $50 American Express gift cards, to 50,000 AMEX points (transferrable to airlines and hotel programs).

I have never, ever participated in these kinds of things, assuming as per my mom's cynical life-training that they're all just "the man trying to screw you." But I've been a lot more points-conscious lately. So I enrolled my cards and promptly forgot all about it. Purely by coincidence I made two purchases that qualified, and within a couple minutes I got "you received a gift from the Gift Chain" emails. One was a $5 credit at Zappos (lame) and one was a $25 credit at Zappos (less lame).

I wasn't falling all over myself to get more of these "buy something, get something gifts" since they basically work to make you spend more money (man=screwing you). But, due to my diligently obsessive research, I found out there was a no-purchase way to enter (write your name, address, email on an index card and mail it in). I had a bad cold, so while I sat around in bed one night I filled out ten entries each for all six of our American Express cards and mailed them in. What? I don't do relaxing.

I was a little shocked as the results started pouring in via email.

Total gifts:

$530 in American Express gift cards

$122 in American Express statement credits

$128 in credits at Zappos

(plus some other stuff I won't really use, like small credits at Pottery Barn, etc)

A little bit better than 30 cents off a jar of Ragu, I think.

Also, did I just beat the man at his own game?

Next time, I promise to share. Unless you're not interested?

S0 last week we took our getaway to Newport Beach (to earn our 100,000 Club Carlson points).

Has anyone else done their "stay"?

At first I was a little irritated with myself. Had I gotten carried away? Had I just paid real dollars to get in on some points action that I might not really need? Were we going to have to suffer a cheesy, run-down hotel stay just to get our points?

Nah. It was a perfect weekend.

The hotel was SO MUCH better than I expected. Sort of retro on the outside and "swanky corporate" on the inside. We were upgraded to the executive floor/executive room without asking, and the wi-fi, parking, and coffee was free. No "forced" incidental costs.

We slept (way) in and had peach cornmeal pancakes and Mexican eggs benedict here.

POOCHES!

PRETTY POOCHES AND POOCHES IN BAD 80s CLOTHING!

Then we caught an insanely good exhibit of experimental California art from the 60s and 70s at one of my favorite little museums, the OCMA.

[INSERT VISUAL OF WEIRD HIPPIES DOING PERFORMANCE ART HERE]

We wandered around for a few hours, completely alone, until we were done with thinking (and being frightened by the 60s). Then we headed across the street to Fashion Island...probably the least offensive mall I've ever been to. It's pretty, has ocean views, and some interesting indie-type shops that I actually want to shop at.

BAD CELL PHONE SHOTS

We watched the new Sherlock Holmes movie in a theater that served alcohol and had massive leather recliner seats.

We hung out and talked over margaritas the size of my face.

And the next day we woke up early and drove out to meet our family at some desert hot springs.

[HIS NEW THING IS "HUMANS WEREN'T MADE TO WEAR SHOES AND I WANT TO CLIMB EVEREST"]

[HIS NEW THING IS GROWING A CUTE LITTLE MUSTACHE AND SLEEPING]

Travel Hack-MOVE FAST!

2011-12-23T10:24:00.000-08:00

Do you like status? How about gold? Then you will love GOLD STATUS!

This travel hack is too easy and I forbid you to ignore it. You can get gold status for a full year at Hilton, which means free upgrades (possibly to suites!), free breakfasts, free wi-fi, access to the locked upper floor executive lounge with drinks and food, free parking, etc. (depending on the property).

Hilton Rome Cavalieri...so it's not the Ace, but it's a place to crash

Oh, I KNOW, you stay at the Ace almost exclusively. Fine. But people do crazy things to attain gold status at Hilton and this is an opportunity to get it with a mouse-click. If you DO find yourself staying at a *GASP* chain hotel at any point this year, you'll be glad you did this. And Hilton foreign properties are amazing and often in cool historic buildings, so it's not such a "corporate experience" abroad.

"Hello, I have gold status thanks to MODERNHAUS. Keys to the executive lounge overlooking the Vatican, please!"

If you don't have a Hilton HHonors account, get one here. Takes a second.

Not the Ace Swim Club. Try to cope.

Then click here and enter the number "411945" into the "Visa" box. Then your HHonors member number and below that, the pin code Hilton gave you. You should get instant gold status.

It's a weird loophole that Hilton will probably close...very soon. Bon chance!

*FOR SOME THIS IS WORKING INSTANTLY AND OTHERS ARE GETTING AN ERROR MESSAGE. If you get an error message, clear your cache and and try it again. It WILL work!

MODERN CHESTERFIELD

2011-12-22T11:26:00.001-08:00

The Chesterfield that makes all other Chesterfields ashamed

Sitting on it makes men more manly and women's hair stronger and thicker

It makes your children smarter

Your friends funnier

Your food taste better

It will get you the job of your dreams

It has all the answers

And it's on sale in the shop for the next two days

All one hundred sexy inches of it

MODERNHAUS pretends to be a travel blogger, part II

2011-12-15T09:46:00.000-08:00

Furniture and hipster jokes are still my "wheel house" as the husband would say. I didn't plan to write more about travel today, but I think this deal is kind of super good and it's expiring soon AND it doesn't involve opening lines of credit, so everyone can do it! So I feel obligated, nay driven, to share. Civic duty is my middle name. And Eve. That's also my middle name. You wanna make something of it?

Gratuitous furniture link here.

Gratuitous hipster link here:

And now the fun stuff:

I never paid attention to hotel rewards, because I mostly hate chain hotels and they're the only ones running these programs. I like renting apartments. It makes me feel cosmopolitan, and also I have to keep coffee close to me at all times. Needing to put on mascara and go outside somewhere and speak a foreign language after an eleven hour flight just to get a thimble of coffee (WHY don't other countries make bigger coffees???) is NOT my wheel house.

"Hola, bonjour, si, I would like 24 of your tiny coffees, poured into your biggest soup bowl please." Spoken in my best loud English. (I don't REALLY do that...in fact, before I go anywhere I learn how to order wine, beer, and coffee in the native language. "Kava, prosim." That's Czech!])

But for a short stay, renting an apartment is not very cost-effective (apartment rentals charge less per night for a week stay, and usually have a hefty cleaning fee that only makes sense amortized over a week...yes, amortized). And there are some places, I'm sure, where AirBnB has no apartments. Cuzco, where we're planning to go soon, for instance.

Also, free nights at some ritzy Paris hotel? Yeah, wheel house. Read on.

Bear with me, 'cuz you're gonna think I've lost my ever-lovin' mind for a moment.

-Use this link to join TGIFridays. OMG, I know. Just close your eyes and do it.

-Then use this link to join Club Carlson, and enter your TGIFridays account number to get 4,500 extra points.

-Then register your Club Carlson account in this promotion.

-Make your spouse/travel partner/trained monkey assistant do the same. Or just do it for them, b/c stealing the identity of one you love is legal.

-Then book ONE NIGHT EACH at the cheapest Radisson hotel you can find before December 30. Book it through the Radisson website, not a secondary booking site. Don't worry...the lowest prices are available on their site so you're not overpaying. It has to be a Radisson, too. Not one of their other properties.

*Oh my gosh you guys, UPDATE: Book using this link for 25% off lowest rate at Radisson, and it qualifies for the promotion!!

(Make sure you and your partner book one night each, using each of your Club Carlson numbers)

Ideally, you actually NEED a hotel room in the next two weeks, but if not, just call it a spontaneous getaway or pretend it's your gift to the love of your life instead of what it really is: greedy, brilliant points hoarding.

Some crazy hoarders actually book the rooms and check in, but don't even stay. It's called a mattress run. People do this.

Net points: 100,000 + 9,000 bonus points for that TGIFriday thing = 109,000

Seriously. 109,000 points that you can redeem to stay at any of their hotels (not just Radissons) anywhere in the world, and redemptions start at 9,000 per night. That's TWELVE FREE NIGHTS if you don't mind "slumming it" at a basic hotel. Most people use these mega bonuses for two nights at really fabulous hotels they could never otherwise afford. Your call.

We are staying at the Radisson Newport Beach in a few days to get our bonuses. It was something like $79 a night with tax. So, for around $160 we get a two-night getaway in a really upscale beach town, AND up to twelve future nights free. That's fourteen nights for $160. According my calculations that translates to $11.42 per night.

You can squeeze way more value out if by using your free nights to stay at some of their $500-700/night properties around the world. That would mean that a $1400 hotel stay would only cost you $160. Also not shabby.

The best part may be that you never actually have to eat at TGIFridays. Bonus!

So, what do you think? Are you going to do it?

*Note: I am NOT being sponsored by Chase, TGIFriday, Radisson, Club Carlson, or the words "wheel house."

I want you all to travel for free

2011-12-14T09:15:00.000-08:00

Aside from getting lots of great things into the shop, lately I've been obsessed with accruing frequent flyer miles. I've learned a lot and thought some of you might be interested in, oh I don't know, TRAVELING FOR FREE?!?

SO, drop your credit cards. Right now. Put them down and don't charge another iTunes, Amazon.com, or Zappos purchase until you finish reading this post. Actually, don't even buy a head of lettuce until you finish reading. I was once like you. If I needed something, I found the best price (sometimes) and bought it. With my debit card.

I can't believe how naive I was. Unless you're so off the grid that you're bartering for tomatoes, there is absolutely no reason you can't take one or two (or more) free trips this year based on your normal spending. The one caveat is this: if you're not disciplined about credit card use, you might be better off just saving cash and finding the cheapest deals for travel. I wrote a detailed post about that method here. There are some non-credit card methods of earning points that you can take advantage of as well, and I'll cover some next week.

For the rest of us, swiping cards is part of our daily life, and as long as you're swiping, you might as well swipe your way to your next vacation.

The following is my basic, beginners advice meant for those that need an intro to the world of points-hoarding. You may already be well beyond this, and there are lots of sites for more advanced frequent flyers. I'm no expert, but I wanted to share what I know in the event that it helps you.

The first thing you need is your first good miles card, with a nice fat bonus and really flexible redemptions. For instance, if you open a US Airways card, you can only redeem for flights on US AIrways and their affiliates. Too much information? I thought so. Just do this:

Apply for a Chase Sapphire Preferred card. Charge $3000 on it within the first three months. Get 50,000 bonus miles. You can use these bonus miles on just about any airline.

Have your spouse/travel partner/significant other apply for their own card.

Net points: 100,000

You now have enough points for two round-trip tickets to Central or South America (Jamie!), and approximately 30,000-40,000 points left over to redeem for hotel stays and/or car rental. Or two off-season round trip tickets to Europe. And the list goes on.

But wait! Because you have a Chase Sapphire card, you now have access to the Chase Ultimate Rewards Mall. It sounds like a tacky place with bad lighting and Cinnabons, but it's not! It's a place where your normal spending is rewarded with massive points! Yay, you!

Before buying ANYTHING online, always link to the site THROUGH Chase Ultimate Rewards. Recently you would have earned 10 points per dollar spent at Apple. Bought an iPad? That would have earned you 6000 extra miles. Bought a Macbook Pro? 20,000 bonus miles (almost a full domestic airplane ticket!) There are hundreds of other stores in the Rewards Mall, and chances are you've shopped at many of them in the past few weeks.

Technically, you could stop at this point and be way ahead of the game. For now, managing one card and working out how to redeem your huge stash of points might be enough. It's a lot to absorb. You'll have some questions. You can ask me and I'll try to answer them.

If you're ready for more information, I'll post next about the second card I think you should have in your wallet.

*Important to know: if you apply for the Chase card and don't get instant approval on-line, call their reconsideration line IMMEDIATELY. Chase is stingy with credit, BUT nearly everyone gets approved by making this call. You might want to read this short tutorial before calling them.

So, I want to know. Do you play the points game? Or does it seem too complicated, or even too good to be true? Do you have any questions about how it works?

If you're dying for more information, you can find a super-extensive beginner's guide here, from my favorite miles blogger. This is where I started and still go when I need a good, clear explanation of something.

Percival Lafer and other things you should buy

2011-12-07T10:26:00.000-08:00

The following is a paid announcement for things I want to sell you in my shop starting this Thursday evening.

I have to admit that several years ago I thought Lafer sofas looked really weird. The way all those hunks of leather were flaccidly draped all over giant logs of wood...I really didn't get it.

I guess this is not making the best case for why you should buy my sexy Lafer sofa?

But after years of looking at lots of furniture, and lots of furniture starting to look all the same to me, I have totally jumped on the Lafer train.

They look edgy, sexy, mysterious. And they throw off a room in a good/unexpected way. In a way that the expected, sterile, anemic Nelson-style sofas could never do.

What do you think? Do you "get" Lafer? This one is like a sexy leather butt-cocoon.

This pair of Mid Century Italian chrome sling chairs has a similarly exotic, edgy flair.

I really want to see them upholstered in distressed, deep brown leather.

But the original flame stitch fabric is in perfect condition and Kelly Wearstler would totally approve. I'll ask her when she comes over next week. I imagine she'll be hungry and wearing awful shoes as per usual. I hope she doesn't try and crimp my hair again. That was a disaster.

If I didn't already have a 90-drawer dresser that doubles as a guest room, I would totally be shoving this set into my bedroom.

I like the handsome, architectural lines. The circular insets. The tall legs that make these big pieces seem almost ergonomic. And I find that walnut is the most pleasing and classic of all the bedroom woods. Don't you?

This sexy thing looks like it's had one too many. Look, I'm not the Annie Liebovitz of furniture photography, ok?

And here are the dresser's soul mates:

These pieces, along with some others, will be available in the shop tomorrow (Thursday) at 7:30 pm PST.

UPDATE: I've added an super-duper, gift-worthy, mint condition, vintage HUDSON'S BAY 6-point multi-stripe blanket to the line-up, with no reserve. Cold, anyone??

CAMPAIGN DESK

2011-11-25T13:17:00.000-08:00

Once upon a time I bought a beautiful house and claimed a room in it as my office. This room was not large, and the dumb old antique glass doorknobs always fell off when I slammed the door shut and yelled, "Be quiet! I'M WORKING!!!" Sometimes they fell off on the outside, which meant eventually someone had to come and let me out. This still happens in the master bath, and so, if you haven't seen me in a while, please check there first.

But it was my room. OK, so I shared it with the ironing board (taunting me always) , a guest sofa, several friendly guitars, and enough amplifiers to recreate the Who's WALL OF SOUND. Yet, when I said the words, "I'll be in the office," I wasn't referring to a blanket fort under the dining room table. You didn't have to follow the extension cord until it ended at me, sitting on the floor in the stair landing, typing furiously. It was a room with a door, and it was mine. Occasionally my family was even kind enough to leave a pen or half-chewed pencil there for me to use.

Fast forward a few phases of child development, and it became necessary to give our sons their own rooms. Among other things, the top bunk was being used to investigate certain laws of physics. Growing up in a house full of girls, it had never occurred to me to see if I could pee on ANYONE'S head from the top bunk. There is simply no way to prepare for certain things about parenting.

There followed a whole year where my "office" was an old desk three feet from the blissful marriage bed, from which my husband would lovingly glare at me, turn over, sigh loudly, and bury his head in three pillows. I felt great about it. I was also able to conserve nearly all my calories, since my commute for the day was: roll out of bed onto rolling chair, push self off wall over to desk. Never had gaining weight been so easy, so automatic!

I decided to rejoin the living by sharing the family computer upstairs. Commence six months of wondering, was it just me or did everyone in my family chew food/breathe so loud that I could not focus on what I was doing? (It was me)

This is my long, I'm-sick-in-bed-so-I'm-going-to-tell-you-my-life-story, way of saying we are turning the garage into an office and I painted an old campaign desk Kelly green. Behr's "Mint Sprig" green to be exact. The rug and the chair look a little awful with it, but nothing says "These would be perfect for mom" like random things dug out of the basement. I know...my selfish materialism knows no bounds.

SO, come visit me in the new office. We can hold important meetings and try and ignore that the garage door was just sprayed by a skunk. I hope you like centipedes and mice as much as I do! Of course, if you don't find me there, it's possible that another family need has forced a relocation of my office. Look for an extension cord. Follow it. There are a few spots we haven't yet tried as my office. There's a crotch in the tree out back I may be able to use...

Adrian Pearsall for Craft Associates "Jacks" Tables

2011-11-07T15:35:00.000-08:00

Regardless of trends and fads, there are some Mid Century pieces that are so intrinsically lovely and well-designed that they become more pieces of art than furniture of a specific era. I definitely think these pieces fall into that category.
In the shop now.

The Next Big Thing in Design

2011-11-07T08:32:00.000-08:00

Mid Century design has always had its collectors, and always will. I think the fact that huge swaths of real estate in this country are Post War means that there will always be a strong market for things that look good in those environments.

But let's be honest with ourselves...the craze of Mid Century; the insinuation of it into every level of design and commerce, into every level of society, probably spells its doom. Three years ago, no one over 30 was familiar with the term "Mid Century." Today, elderly folks are using all the right key terms to accurately attribute their furniture on Craigslist. Or innacurately. Suddenly everything is Mid Century. The awful table made out of a wagon wheel. The "French Provincial" girl's bedroom set.

We are visually saturated with these images, and the eye grows weary. Rather than finding the lines fresh and stimulating, they will begin to seem a little old. Common. When every mop and kitty litter commercial begins to feature homes decorated in vaguely or overtly Mid Century style, it's a good sign that the renaissance of MCM is over. It's been appropriated by the mainstream, and it has become, for the time being, boring.

So what's on the horizon? If we know one thing, it's that trends swing to extremes: once overstuffed and comfy got old, we turned to clean, lean, and modern. So, if the slim, uncomplicated lines of Mid Century seem overplayed, what will the market turn to next? What, exactly, is the antithesis of the 60s?

Interviews as far back as 2006 and 2007 have tastemakers declaring the 80s as The Next Big Thing. "Mark my words," they say, and yet several years later it hasn't truly come to fruition.

At an auction several years ago, a designer, mistaking my friendliness for naivete (happens all the time), decided to share with me her trade secrets. Pointing to a Mid Century chair she said, "Whatever you do, don't buy that stuff. It's on its way out. Florals and Modern Country are making a comeback."

One thing we do know is that we won't, currently, find the Next Big Thing all that attractive. Maybe right now we even find it repulsive. That's because it hasn't been overexposed yet, and retailers haven't adapted it to make it more approachable.

So, maybe Kelly Wearstler's weird mauve lacquered 80s hotel furniture is just a frontrunner for the styles we will all be dying for in a few years. Maybe we love to hate her because we don't (yet) understand her. Maybe the visual equivalent of elevator music really is the Next Big Thing.

What's your forecast for the NBT? What trends are you spotting?

AMERICAN PICKERS

2011-10-31T12:01:00.000-07:00

This past Sunday we went with some new friends (a trio of Glamazon sisters that have befriended our oldest) to our local mountains for some fresh air and apple picking. It was a perfect day, in that way that perfect days can only spontaneously occur. The kind that no amount of planning can replicate.

And there was pie. Glorious, apple-berry, crumb-topped pie.

How was your weekend?

in miniature

Snow White

cousins

killer apples

beating the system

Renaissance girl

orchard worker

wildlife

The trouble with Morgan Satterfield

2011-10-26T10:21:00.000-07:00

is that she will ask to use your bathroom and take her camera with her (and not come back for 20 minutes). The good thing is that she will take pictures of the very tiny spaces in your house NOT covered in laundry.
Thanks for using your artsy editing skills to show the ten square feet of my house that look good!

You left out my favorite rug:

The granny hoarder crap on my honky tonk pianee:

More rugishness, featuring the backyard tulip table and $20 bentwood cafe chairs:

The Moroccan artifact wing of the house:

Libations (I don't know what Red Stag is...it was a gift, it stays!):

Signs of the times (these were being used to patch holes in our garage walls...actually carriage house walls since it's pre-automotive era...but we DO have iron rings in our sidewalk where you can tie up your horses, before coming inside to drink Jameson and listen to me play the honky tonk pianee...also those old bentwood chairs are perfect for smashing over someone's head in a barfight since they won't hurt much...OMG it's pretty much the Old West over here)

A tipsy, leaning tower of Pisa-esque view of my new Danish cabinetry:

Aaaaaand finally, my husband's favorite piece of art, the He/She. I like to make up stories about her when people come over. Tons of fun.

You may have noticed that there are not pictures of bathrooms or kids' rooms in these or Brick House photos...and that is because this house was built before kids or digestion had been invented, sooooo.

No, actually my kids probably have the best rooms in the house and I'll have to get to that. The bathrooms are what you would expect; various holes and levers, implements of self-loathing (scale), a fancy "makeup area" containing (one) one-inch long brown eyeliner , some Daddy Longlegs in the corner. Can you picture it??

(Watch someone else) make a DIY Lindsey Adelman Chandelier!

2011-10-10T14:05:00.001-07:00

Believe! It's true. I finally got rid of the neo-Colonial Restoration Hardware chandelier monstrosity in my dining room. Tall people, you can once again roam free and upright in my house without fear of getting clocked in the head by an oversized fixture with delusions of grandeur (I am grand! I hold 20 lightbulbs! People who buy me also buy fake topiaries! I am from the mall!)

I looked for a brass sputnik forever. I would have paid real money, maybe even more than $20, had the right one shown itself. But only the dented, cheapy faux brass, overpriced variety surfaced. Lots of "these sell for $5000 and I am only asking $1500 cash no haggling no dealers firm don't even try to talk me down!" Craigslist ads. Speaking of delusions of grandeur...

Well, no big thang. I wanted a Lindsey Adelman anyways. Trendy? Yeah, I guess in certain (blogger) circles it is. But more interpretive than a sputnik. Sculptural. Branch-like. Able to be repositioned with a single impatient hand.

I bought the approximately $120 worth of parts from Adelman's online list (this included ten Edison bulbs) and handed my husband the plans. It only took ten minutes to put it together, but another few hours to work out the wiring. It's not that the instructions were unclear, it's just that jamming six wires through a tiny pipe was like trying to fit a Costco shopping trip into a NYC apartment kitchen.

I bought an old brass ceiling canopy and had the talented husband hardwire it into our existing junction box. The plans call for using it as a swag fixture, but I said no gracias to twenty feet of chains draped all over my dining room. La Boeuf plastered the hanging rod straight into his ceiling, which I've never seen done:

M'lady Morgan made a beautiful version:

My hanging rod is shorter, since we walk under part of the fixture and we're not headbangers (anymore!)

I'm really happy with the look. It has sort of an industrial-classic look. The best thing is that all the parts are solid brass. I thought I would have to apply some vinegar to age it, but my husband assured me that it would oxidize just from being handled while he built it, and he was totally right. Within a couple of days the brass had a nice aged look. This is a good job for your greasy, sweaty teenagers. If you need your brass aged, send it over here. We have sweaty palms and greasy fingers to spare!

Yep, Thomas Jefferson's dining set is no more. Someday that will be an oval marble tulip table, instead of the one I rescued from my neighbor's back yard.

Someday when people ask where I found a piece, I won't have to give them geographical coordinates but actual store names. Not that I mind.

So, what's the consensus? Love or loathe?

.....................................................................................

You're Probably a Hipster If...Jokes

2011-10-05T21:54:00.001-07:00

How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

I don't know, it's kind of an obscure number. You've probably never heard of it.

(courtesy of the 9th graders at High Tech High Media Arts...hipsters-in-training the lot of 'em)

The Trouble with Reading

2011-10-05T10:37:00.001-07:00

I've fallen down a rabbit hole but it's ok, I've been here before.

As a kid I spent entire years of my life here, reading book after book, walking around with barely one foot in this world. Having kids meant I had to choose the Now, although I could have easily become one of those professors that bumps into things and wears the same clothes three days in a row.

I could have been even weirder than I am now. Imagine.

I watch my son, coming late to the experience of really reading, doing the same. He comes home late from school and immediately excuses himself, apple in hand, to his room. He lays on his bed sideways, propped on an elbow, facing the wall and curled around his book.

I make no sound when I see him there-the large, messy pile of books next to his bed a small version of my own. I know that he's not really there, and that if I speak to him the voice that answers me won't be his.

Inside the books he is finding the things that I want him to find, and the things that I'm afraid he'll find. He reads about the Chumash, the Maus graphic novels that make their ugly but necessary mark on him, John Muir's memoirs.

At this age I know that each book will somehow be about him, while the books I read are less clear to me; a Chinese scholar swatting flies under Chairman Mao's rule, a plain slave marrying a farmer and living through cycles of want and prosperity, a Black Atlanta teenager navigating a complicated family, Indian immigrants and the seductively academic world they inhabit. I recognize the universal problems of "being", the work of becoming oneself among the complications of community and family, the blurry line that context makes between right and wrong.

And when I get up from my books, I have that old familiar feeling of being a little tender and lost in the world. I look at a lamp and try to force myself to think "lamp," but I can't.

Today my mind is curled around its books. I am turned towards a wall, but I see everything.

What I'm reading this week:

The Bitter Sea, Charles N. Li
The Good Earth, Pearl S. Buck (again)
Unaccustomed Earth, Jhumpa Lahiri (run, run, run to buy this)
Silver Sparrow, Tayari Jones
Swim Back to Me, Ann Packer
The Power of One, Bryce Courtenay
Last Child in the Woods, Richard Louv

Well-travelled Mid Century tables from Morocco and Scandinavia

2011-09-26T09:17:00.000-07:00

Man, I love these tables; the collapsible mahogany spider legs, the hammered brass top incised with a paisley pattern, the perfect amount of age, ethnicity, and modernism. It would add some worldly "gravitas" to a spare, modern space.

Available in the shop now (along with some other goodies!)

They're teak, they nest, they are wearing some beautiful hand-made Scandinavian tiles in black, brown, cream, orange, and mineral green. They are lovely. Get them here, now.

Stealing Beauty-Travels in Barcelona...first 24 hours

2011-09-22T11:05:00.000-07:00

Day one: first thing first; reassemble the longboard.

Curses to IKEA and its ubiquitous LACK table! Did I expect Spanish antiques in a rental apartment? Well, a girl's gotta dream.

French doors/bedroom/Catalan tile/first evening taking pictures of everything mode.

Surveying the land: looking right and left from the apartment balcony. In the Eixample District just off Passeig Saint Joan. Quite a bit like Paris.

la Rita

Swank. Packed with Spanish ladies who lunch. Gorgeous interior.

First meal that did not consist of cafe con leche and jamon in baguette standing up.

We all look like we got punched in the eye sockets. Yay jet lag!

Entrance, La Boqueria

Meat gold at la Boqueria.

Something about the look in his eye...he seems bored? Also a little put out that one of his mates is on his head.

Not a placenta. Well, maybe an alien placenta?

Nutty

Architecture spanning Roman rule in the 800s to the 1700s in the same square

Very Montagues and Capulets

From inside Christopher Columbus's head.

Well, his monument's head. I totally forgot he was sort of a big deal in Spain.

Looking towards city center.

And towards the harbor and Montjuic

Is there an exhibit to get inside a teenager's head? No, it would be too scary.

Don't just stand there-make something! Whole wheat cranberry scones with Greek yogurt

2011-09-16T11:45:00.000-07:00

I know that at least 90% of you hipster ladies have all the ingredients for this on hand, and since it's a little chill and cloudy today I thought just maybe you'd like the smell of cinnamon and vanilla baking to fill the house. I swear, there is NOTHING like a pile of fresh-baked somethings, a cup of tea, and a Sunset magazine to make a lady feel new again (even if the Sunset magainze is from 1997 and you stole it from the dentist's office).

These are not the stiff, hard scones of yore but are rather more delicate and soft inside with a crunchy exterior (when still warm at least). I combined a few recipes and changed things around to come up with the perfect mix of health and taste.

I hope they cure what ails ya.

Take Two and Call Me in the Morning Healthy Yogurt Scones

DRY INGREDS:
1 cup dried cranberries
1 cup regular flour + 1 cup whole wheat flour
1 tbsp baking powder
1/2 tsp soda
1/4 c. sugar
1 tsp cinnamon

6 tbsp cold regular (salted) butter

WET INGREDS:
1 egg
3/4 c. Greek yogurt plain
1/4 c. milk
1 tsp vanilla

Heat oven to 400
Soak cranberries in hot water 10 minutes, drain
Whisk together dry ingredients
Cut in or rub in butter with fingers until crumb forms (pieces of butter should be no larger than pea size)
Mix in cranberries
Mix wet ingredients, add to dry ingredients and mix until JUST combined
Scoop 8 mounds onto lightly greased cookie sheet
Bake 20 minutes, or until golden and firm

GLAZE:
1 c. powdered sugar
1-2 tbsp orange juice (or lemon juice or milk)
1 tsp vanilla

Mix and drizzle over completely cooled scones.

{p.s.-according to kitchen law, the cook is entitled to all spilled glaze}

DIY Franz Kline Large-Scale Abstract Art

2011-09-15T10:21:00.000-07:00

I've been bookmarking paintings just like this for several years now. For someone who redecorates DAILY it's a real good sign when I like something for that long. It means I must really, really like it and I won't be trying to sell it to you on Craigslist within the week. It might even last a year!

I love the graphic face-slap of the black and white and the heavy strokes, and I feel like it really balances out the fussiness of an old home.

Dudes, it is NOT easy trying to introduce the 60s to the 20s. Sometimes you put them together in a room and they get all awkward and quiet and shuffle their feet and then you realize your intergenerational design marriage has failed. Slowly I'm learning how to make these opposites do the rhumba together in this neo-English mini manor house of mine.

So yesterday I finally got out some materials and made myself a real, live, super-fake Franz Kline.

It's not finished, and I hung it up unframed and wet being the instant-gratification princess that I am. It's crooked and hanging on an old nail. If anyone sneezes, it's a goner.

My art critic oldest child says, "You need to feather the lines more."

My husband said, "What's up, Picasso?"

My youngest has probably already wiped a booger on it.

After it dries, I might feather the lines more and maybe build up the paint a little for more texture. It's a simple and super-cheap project, but it's deceptively complicated trying to get a few lines to look just right.

Materials:

A pre-gessoed (prepped and ready to paint) canvas from Michael's

left-over exterior latex semi-gloss paint from Glidden in Onyx Black (from my front door)

oil paint in white

a regular 4" paintbrush from Home Depot (don't get those short, cheap ones...it would be impossible to achieve the look of a bold stroke)

a pencil for sketching

an old nail for impatiently pounding into your lovely wallpaper to see the results

Technique:

To make it easier to get the proportions right, I printed the picture out from my computer and divided it into quadrants. Then I penciled out quadrant marks on my canvas. This was really important and only took 15 minutes or so.

I sketched out the lines, and then painted the negative space white first. Then I added in the black strokes and spent about an hour feathering the edges, standing back to look, and adjusting elements that just didn't look right.

The total cost (because I bought the canvas with a 50% off coupon and had old paint) was about $25.

I plan to make a simple black frame for it, and even hang it on a real picture hanger. Soon, I promise.

An Increase in Natural Disasters-What Does it all Mean, Modernhaus??

2011-09-12T08:04:00.000-07:00

I hear your cries for my leadership on this matter. So believe me, I am formulating some ridiculous thoughts to share. I am culling from the most cutting-edge research and will be prepared to disseminate my findings soon. Which is different from inseminating them, which is technically impossible (but I bet there's a lab in China where they're trying it out).

Is it global warming? My armpits say yes. I have indeed observed an increase in rank sweat flow. It can only mean one of two things: 1)the Earth is becoming hotter, or 2) I am becoming a old European man.

If, despite my personal experience you are still skeptical, here is shocking proof found buried in the research of this acclaimed researcher (government cover-up? I think so!)

You should know that the image you are about to see is graphic, and some may find it disturbing. Especially those with good taste in lawn furniture.

I'm sorry you had to see that. But now you know. Global warming is a fact, and the end is nigh.

Do we have any classes together? or Does anyone blog in the summer?

2011-09-08T09:54:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile. But I promise I thought about you all summer. How I should call you more. How we should catch up over a couple of Dairy Queen ice cream cones. Ride our bikes down to the park and lay under the big pine and talk about which is grosser; having someone stick a finger in your bellybutton or your eye (I will vote bellybutton and you will vote eye, every time). Compare leg tans (you always win).

Summertime blogging is kind of like that summer between 9th and 10th grade. The one where you crushed on some boy hard, and guiltily ditched your best friend all summer to hang around him. But as school approached you start hoping she'll forgive you. The guy turned out to be needy and have sort of bad breath. But her? She's perfect, as best friends always are in that intense, you-were-made-for-me, symbiotic girl-love sort of way.

You call to offer your best tank top for her first day of school outfit. A guilty trick to woo her back, and it works. You compare school schedules and arrange to ride together on the first day. She's forgiven you, and you love her all the more for it.

I'm gonna GOOP you Gwyneth-style with some Spain deets shortly. But first I had to make sure...you'll still sit with me at lunch, right? I'll let you wear my Esprit tank top if you do.

From the vault: hipster love

2011-08-14T04:51:00.000-07:00

When I wrote this, I had been spending a lot of time in L.A., the Ace Hotel in Palm Springs, New York City, and Portland.

At the time, it seemed like hipsters had taken over the world. I felt like I was swimming in a sea of plaid. Bicycle-riding, mustachioed, ironic tote bag-toting art school drop-outs (or honors graduates, more likely) swarmed from their all-white minimalist apartments in droves. And they wanted to MAKE THINGS and SELL THEM TO YOU ON ETSY.

These things would be made of felted wool, or else chunks of wood. They would have owls, whales, or mustaches on them. For these three were the totem symbols of Hipsterism. The sacred trinity of cool.

I think the hipsters are kind of busy making a living now. Some of them had kids and realized that onesies with screenprinted mustaches are just as gross when covered with spit-up as cheap regular ones. Some were successful with their restaurants/goat cheese-making/cupcake shop, and now they are yuppies.

This original post spawned a whole regular column about hipsters for a time, with varying degrees of success. And it was funny, until it wasn't anymore.

Sometimes people ask me to write hipster smack again, but I think that much like the pet rock their day has passed.

What do you think? Are the hipsters alive and well?

From the vault: write what you know

2011-08-12T05:00:00.000-07:00

I remember that writing this post made me feel a little sad. I mean, I was anthropomorphizing laundry for Pete's sake (hi Pete!)

I was going to be a writer, an explorer! And the most interesting thing I had to write about was the laundry!

On the other hand, it's kind of a Warhol move don't you think? To take something so benign and ordinary and make it art?

Briefly let's review the flattering comparisons I've managed to make with myself thus far: In post one, I am as funny as Tina Fey. Post two, I am a child-rescuing super hero. Post three, my laundry is art that rivals a post-Modern master.

I swear I am not an egomaniac. Despit heavy evidence to the contrary.

Anyways, anyone who does a great deal of laundry will identify with this post. I hope it makes you smile the next time you open the dryer door...

From the vault: how I made fast enemies with rich people

2011-08-10T05:00:00.000-07:00

This post really accurately reflects my "voice".

I have to preface this by saying that everything in the story actually happened to me, exactly the way it is written, during a trip to NYC last year. It's what I made of it that is entirely my own (and won me some enemies).

It was one of those unbelievably sentient moments, where I was exquisitely aware of the evening light, the coolness of the air, the sound of horse hooves on the cobblestones, and the faces of these lovely, strange children in the window overlooking Central Park.

I'm aware that it's a little cruel, but also that it's a little beautiful, no?

From the vault: FASHION HAUS

2011-08-08T05:00:00.000-07:00

I know every girl (except for the obviously hot ones) thinks she has lots in common with Tina Fey. Or wishes, for whatever reason. It's hip to be geek, I guess.
But I gotta say, my penchant for self-mockery in this pre-Bossy Pants post is eerily Fey-ish.

You can at least give me this: If Tina Fey is the anti-Hollywood star, then I am the anti-blogger.

Click here to read this old nugget I found under the couch, covered in dog hair and a little bit moldy, but still tasty and nutritious.

Did you read it the first time around? Why didn't you comment then, jerk?

While you were out...

2011-08-07T11:55:00.000-07:00

I thought I would take a break from sitting on suitcases and mentally rehearsing how to say "Gracias" as "Grathiath" to say ciao to you.

I have pre-travel butterfly-stomach. Do you get that? It's that childhood-night-before-Disneyland-trip feeling of excitement and nervousness. Also, it's coffee. Way too much of it.

Over the past few weeks a number of friends/clients/strangers have told us that Barcelona is their favorite city in the world. That's a high recommendation. I've found the best travel advice from expat bloggers living in Barcelona...blogs have absolutely changed the way I research trips, and I'll definitely contribute my own two cents when I return.

Until then, I'd like to introduce you to my guest blogger...me. Back when I first started this blog, I was really missing the act of writing and I gave myself permission to spend time doing it. I feel like my posts were much more thoughtful, funny, dense, and interesting back in the day. I'm sure as my life ebbs and flows there will come a time when I'll be a more dedicated blogger again.

So, while I'm away, come visit the weird and wild early days of MODERNHAUS.

A glass of wine makes it better. A lot of wine makes it genius.

SPENDY

2011-08-01T19:05:00.000-07:00

Kork-Ease sandals (see more kork ease sandals)

Because I didn't really have a choice. What else am I going to cavort around Barcelona in? Flip-flops for chrissakes??

These bear the sexy name "KORK-EASE". Not hooker shoes, these.

I'm making up the cost by getting everything at the thrift store for a year...oh wait, I already do that!

If I put on one of these:

By Malene Birger top (see more long sleeve tops)

and cover my butt with pretty much anything, I'm golden. Right?

Maybe something unmatched and fun, like these:

Rebecca Minkoff shorts (see more summer shorts)

COLOR/THEORY

2011-07-26T09:58:00.000-07:00

I had to share this image from this house tour. I think the entire composition is brilliant, and it reminds me a bit of an Old Masters painting.

I'm really going through a "blue period" in design...I've never liked blue much but now I want every room to be a saturated sea color.

I'm thinking of painting the walls in my all-white-vintage-tiled bathroom a glossy lacquered blue-black. Maybe even digging up an old brass porthole mirror.

Do you have dark wall colors? Do you like it?

The Great $16.50 European Resort Wardrobe...How to Dress for Barcelona

2011-07-22T11:00:00.000-07:00

As modelled by my cowhide rug...

So as is turns out my very stoic husband did NOT want to roll around on the floor screaming out, "Yes! Yes! Talk to the camera!! You're gorgeous baby!!"

And I'm not 14, so taking pictures of myself is out of the question. At least as far as you will ever know...

So it's a little retarded, but I threw together some of my thrift scores from the other day to create some possible outfits for my upcoming Barcelona/Tossa del Mar trip. Don't get too critical...we're talking $2 dresses here!

Which is exactly how much this white cotton piece cost. It's short, lined, and has peasant sleeves. Looks great belted and dressed up a bit for town, and then unbelted over a bathing suit for beachside sangria...

The thick tooled-leather belt was thrifted, the woven clutch was a clearance find at the GAP at least ten years ago ($5), the fedora is an old discount store find, as are the brass rivet sandals.

I found an army green (my color du jour by the way) French striped boatneck tunic, $2.95, and added a short black cotton skirt, my Scaramanga leather bag, and a brand new (thrifted) pair of patent leather flats ($2.95). Somehow it looks frumptastic in the photos, but much cuter in person...

And finally, my dual-action day into night look!

These are my old-as-the-hills skinnies (embarrassingly from Target...) with a thrifted billowy tank, thrifted eel skin clutch, and the thrifted flats.

For a nighttime flamenco show or tapas dinner, I'll change into my new-but-thrifted Bass heeled brogues ($2.50--even though the tag says $4.95 red tags were half off) and add my thrifted Gucci tuxedo jacket (I found it in the boys section for $3.95).

I actually bought more, but not everything made it into the photos. I think I am positively ruined for shopping in regular stores...besides which there's nothing under $300 that I am the least bit interested in! I love that when you pick up something for $2, it doesn't matter if you only wear it once and there is absolutely no buyer's remorse to deal with! Then again, I've already worn that white dress three times since Wednesday...

I'm Happy, Feeling Glad

2011-07-20T12:18:00.000-07:00

This has been the summer of Summer. I don't mean that everything is going my way...not at all. Ebay sales are taking a long, extended vacation for instance.

And my 13-year old is in an awful "criticize and question everything my mom does" phase. And also a "find everything she does irritating" phase. I am unpopular, and there's no sign of a comeback on the horizon.

Yet Dad is still, confoundingly, the awesomest human being alive. Dads get all the brakes I think.

And nothing in my life is or ever has been easy or free. I do my own stunts. What I have, I have made happen pretty much on my own, and that has meant years of steady and very hard work, saving, self-discipline, and, in the realm of relationships, intense loyalty and emotional investment (also a few bucks worth of therapy).

Maybe that's what accounts for the extreme pleasure and satisfaction of seeing my life take shape to be something, well, rather close to what I wanted it to be, with a few surprise elements mixed in.

Very early on, I clearly remember deciding to go for happiness, and you know what? I found it. As a kid I just sort of instinctually knew...that I would have to insist on it. That I couldn't compromise and that there would be no shortcuts. That it's not an easy path to walk. That lots of things would try and throw me off the path to happiness. Some by masquerading as happiness (money, selfish ambition, the promise of a "better" or "easier" life with someone else or somewhere else), and some by overshadowing it. Disappointment. Bitterness. Loss.

I have walked through the valley of the shadow of yuck, most surely, and for many years, but I feared no evil because I really did believe with all of my big squishy heart that I would come out on the other side happy.

The Bible, since you mentioned it, says people can be "refined" by fire, like metal. You can get burned up and blackened by life, or you can let the fire burn away the impurities and come out solid.

This week in particular I am filled with motherly gratitude. As all mothers can attest, it is the nirvana of motherhood to be able to raise your children as you wish to, providing them with the things you value.

Last night as we sat on a bougainvillea-covered patio eating dinner and talking--about our upcoming trip to Spain, about the day spent surfing and kayaking, about our goals--I felt, I don't know, rewarded? Blessed? Fortunate? I guess all of the above, and peaceful too.

I am exquisitely aware that I have a privileged life (even if to others it doesn't look that way), and that most parents don't have the option of taking care of their children the way they would like.

That's why I get the deepest joy out of things that seem silly; a bag full of new jeans for school, air conditioning, organic cherries, a Fleet Foxes song that comes on the radio as we drive along the ocean. These things make me feel like the luckiest girl in the world.

Today my kids are doing this

to this bridge, and then anchoring for lunch and a swim

And very, very soon we are all going to there

and there

This morning I dropped by the thrift store and bought a European resort wear wardrobe for $16.50 including two pair of shoes.

Want to see me model them with my knobby knees and freckles and gap-tooth grin? Come back later and see if I convince the husband to play fashion photographer!

REDONE/REDUX

2011-07-16T11:42:00.000-07:00

Yes, it has been SO LONG that I actually forgot my Blogger password.

I thought I would pop in for a little chat and to show you what I've been up to. I would need ten blogs to show you everything I've been up to, so let's just focus on the bedroom redo, ok?

The cavernous Mid Century walnut dresser was a $50 Craigslist find a year or two back...saved from Ebay by the fact that it weighs as much as a car and really can't be shipped

I bought a real piece of furniture, although it's West Elm so I'm using the term "real" very liberally.

Actually, it looks and feels very substantial in person. Purchased during a 25% off sale, and the in-stock fabric to avoid shipping charges, it was surprisingly affordable. Although for someone accumstomed to $0-$25 for significant furniture it was painful.

We had our carpet torn out and the 90-year old wood floors redone. We moved all our posessions out onto the lawn for two weeks. It was awful. Kinda like childbirth, it's one of those "if someone had told me how bad it was going to be, I would have never done it but I'm glad I did it and now it's over" things.

Thrift store abstract that has made its way onto almost every wall in my house looking for a home...the $5.95 tag is still on it. Once I commit to keeping it there, I promise to hang it properly (Morgan!)

Mid Century 20" diameter brass and glass globe, accidental Craigslist find (I went to buy a trio of Nelson bubble lamps, and the owner offered me this for $20).

Thrift store ceiling medallion $4.95.

Custom work from TerriPlanty, frankly priceless.

IKEA hide, $199. I literally pulled down every single hide in the middle of the store and spent two hours choosing this one. Ruben stood by holding my purse and trying not to gouge his eyes out. Brownie points.

Super-old Target coverlet. Eh, it works for now!

SO. MUCH. SPACE!

Nailhead

Finances and poetry? Dichotomous bedside reading. The enigma that is me.

Yes, it's real and it's fabulous (thanks M for the find!)

Oh yes, $25 on Craigslist.

It's funny, I wrote this awhile back about tidy, all-white interiors. I meant to install a psychadelic wallpaper feature wall and some jade green or yellow drapes. This all-whiteness was just meant as a "bottom layer" upon which to build. But it's so soothing, and such a nice respite from the deep colors and contast in the rest of the house, I think I'll keep it.

He is the Most Interesting Credenza in the World

2011-06-20T21:21:00.000-07:00

In the shop now

Her Name is Rio

2011-06-20T08:49:00.000-07:00

and she doesn't have any shame
she wears leg warmers
and she dances through the pain
and when her kids beg her
to stop she says no way
oh Rio's husband is late
for his tennis game

Yes, there WAS a lot of air tennis guitar in the 80s...I was there:

The preppy and the club dancer with a heart 'o gold:

Ralph Macchio, 'dat you?

Most naturally awesome:

Best dancer by far:

We went to an 80s party, obviously. Almost busted a friend's tooth out with a karaoke microphone. It was aight.

Killing Me Softly (with pesticides)

2011-06-15T08:47:00.000-07:00

Oh human race, you are baffling. Somehow you have taken nature's perfect food and turned it into cancer-causing, neurotoxic death grenades.

The next time you see some study or headline or lame-o doctor proclaiming that "there is no evidence that organic is better", please feel free to revisit these facts:

Grapes have up to 14 different pesticides in a single sample

Peaches are treated with more pesticides than any other produce--with combinations of up to 57 different chemicals found in their flesh

Hot peppers are treated with as many as 97 pesticides, cucumbers 68, and greens (lettuce and dark greens like spinach, kale, mustard greens...you know, the really good stuff) up to 66.

You can read about the methodology of this annual study (as well as other fun and encouraging facts!) by clicking here.

The EWG comes up with a safe and unsafe list every year.

Here are their "dirty dozen" worst offenders:

apples
celery
strawberries
peaches
spinach
nectarines
grapes
red/yellow bell peppers
potatoes
blueberries
lettuce
kale/collard greens
[cilantro]*
[cucumbers]*
[raspberries]*

*also tested off the charts for pesticide contamination

And here are their "clean fifteen" with zero or very minimal contamination:

onions
sweet corn
pineapples
avocado
asparagus
sweet peas
mangos
eggplant
cantaloupe
kiwi
cabbage
watermelon
sweet potatoes
grapefruit
mushrooms

I don't know about you, but I'm shopping with this list from now on.

If by "winding down" you mean going crazy, also eBay

2011-06-14T10:39:00.000-07:00

There's no way you can say that the end of a school year "winds down". That implies that something is gradually slowing down until it completely stops.

If by winding down they mean a manic two week frenzy of events, finals, yearbooks, daily demands for more volunteers and money ("if every parents donates $100, twenty hours of time, and all the supplies, we can make this school carnival a raging success!"), "balloon bouquets" attacking you from behind while you try maneuvering your car to the 10th graduation ceremony that week, a gaggle of kids that no longer view a crisp $10 bill and a pat on the back as an acceptable gift, all culminating in a huge Costco sheetcake-fueled nervous breakdown in somebody's streamer-bedecked garage, well yes, then I guess things ARE winding down over here.

But this year I am prepared. A little more than a week from now, I'll be luxuriating in my rented Mid-Century Palm Springs house, and there will be absolutely no balloons or sheetcakes allowed. Here's a peek of where I'll be staying:

Meanwhile I've managed to get a bit of work accomplished, although I'm not sure it matters. With all the events everyone has going on, eBay is getting as much traffic as Charlie Sheen's parenting website. Actually, less. No, he doesn't really have one. I made that up.

Check the store here.

Huge, chunky, wild 70s Danish teak dining table:

Set of eight comfortable Danish chairs:

Some vintage campaign furniture:

D. I. Why Am I Doing This?

2011-06-08T16:31:00.000-07:00

There are a lot of projects I just can't wrap my head around tackling right now. I was in the fabric store yesterday and I gave myself a talking to: "You do NOT want to try and sew yourself something right now. You will not finish it. No. Don't argue. You WILL NOT!"

I know that some of you are KRAFTY with a capital K and can't touch anything without folding it into a cute shape and letterpressing it with your self-designed logos. You are awesome.

The poopy news about running a (non-crafty) business and living with giant hungry children is that wood-blocking my own drapes is going to have to wait. Lena Corwin's awesome book taunts me from the coffee table every night as I slip into a late-night KPBS/cheese coma.

I will battle my textile demons later.

But for now, there has to be something fun, easy, and REALLY, REALLY quick for the rest of us right?

YES! I love this idea. It takes like $1 and ten seconds. Even I can afford it.

Use a glue gun to apply lettering or patterns to an old glass jar and spray paint over it. How awesome for a party? Save your old Trader Joe's jars, paint them all the same color, and then group them together for centerpieces! You could glue-gun the bride's new monogram for a bridal shower, a baby's name for a babyshower, or just do modern geometric shapes and paint black or gray for something modern.

For custom-colored utensils, buy a bunch from the dollar store, tape off the tops and spray the handles (or dip if you have old cans of house paint to use).

I don't know if it would hold up in the dishwasher, but who cares? It's cheaper than renting utensils, and probably the same price as buying "good" plastic stuff!

O.K., so these are the craft version of serving olives with toothpicks as "appetizers" but who cares? It's quick and salty, and gosh darn it, if everyone is drinking they won't notice you were being lazy.

Kittinger Mandarin/Greek Key Furniture

2011-06-03T09:40:00.001-07:00

Don't hate, but I recently acquired a full set of Kittinger Mandarin bedroom furniture. The estate was immaculate and the pieces look like they just rolled out of the factory. They have the original, sort of Tiffany blue/green lacquer, and baby these pieces are MASSIVE!

Look for them in the shop within the next week or two!

I love Greek Key motifs when used with restraint. Which probably doesn't surprise you since I have a Thomas Jefferson dining set and rugs from civilizations that don't even exist anymore.

I want to have my way with this amazing goldenrod number:

If you like this look but don't own an oil well or small Middle Eastern country, here are a pair of excellent hacks to try:

Bri used a really blah little dresser and some simple trim:

And made this:

I totally love the colors, but for you minimalists a tone-on-tone paint job would still be really beautiful.

It might go something like this:

That hack inspired Jaimee (whose blog seems to be defunct) to turn this:

into this:

This qualifies as super-brilliant because the white IKEA Malm dresser already has a nice, glossy white lacquer finish, and that's just not easy to achieve using a can of spray paint!

Any great projects this weekend?

The Bill and Melinda Gates School for Hipster Children (where Obama almost came to speak)

2011-06-02T10:37:00.000-07:00

It was my turn to drive carpool the other day, and I pulled over to capture this with my cell phone:

It's the view from my kid's school--sparkling water, a sprinkling of yachts, the downtown skyline. You know, pretty much like every other school NOT.

This is the school at which, this semester, the kid's elective class is tightrope walking in the park. The school at which his roller derby-playing, band-member hipster Humanities teacher explained to me that my son is not being lazy and talking too much, but rather "socially maturing" and "fomenting his masterpiece". I know, look it up.

I just walked in on them playing bongos and singing "Don't Stop Believin". With their teacher. I joined in of course, because I am a parent who gets involved.

Yet the kid still occasionally wails that he wishes school had "never been invented".

Oh, you mean that air conditioned fun-factory by the bay that I take you to every day? Yeah. I feel you honey.

When I was his age, I was spending my days in Home Ec, accidentally sewing sleeves on inside-out with a 100-year old sewing machine, while getting regular updates on my breast and butt development from a fat red-headed kid named Brian.

So you know what? Don't get all "I know why the caged bird sings" on me kid. Go foment something why don't you?

Things Good Mothers Do and other whack lies

2011-05-31T22:40:00.000-07:00

Things good mothers do:

Bake homemade cookies with organic peanut butter, sneaking in bits of flax and whole wheat flour

Things good mothers who run businesses do:

See above, then realize you can't just stand in front of the oven all day and turn the last of the dough into one giant cookie. Pass it off as a deliberate novelty. "I thought you guys would like it!" They did.

George Nelson and whatnot

2011-05-26T20:05:00.000-07:00

I completely forgot to post about the mind-blowing rosewood Westnofa platform bed:

and dresser set I had

And now it's gone forever. I cried a little.

Today I've just listed another Uchida Z chair and ottoman, some fabulous little nightstands, a long, sleek, sculptural walnut credenza, and....

A George Nelson design for American of Martinsville

Did you know he designed for other manufacturers? No you didn't.

I think that purpley upholstery is a giveaway. Very Nelson.

Some beautiful grasscloth never hurts...

Ooh, swirly!

Topless!!

In the shop right this hot little minute!

Not Dead Yet

2011-05-21T17:45:00.000-07:00

So why not post a picture I just took of the top of my piano (if you're Western-y or an old man Scooby Doo villain, then you can call it a pianee)?

Being not-dead is as good a reason as any.

I love that awesome old charcoal desert sketch. It reminds me of a place we use to hike when I was a kid.

And that milk bottle is from the dairy where we got our milk when I was a kid (until we got milking goats, ugh)! They had a drive-through where you picked up your order (plus some fabulous ice cream bars).

And I find that badly-executed little abstract so charming. Yeah, it looks like Picasso painted it with his butt.

What are you up to since you're hopefully not-dead?

Mundane

2011-05-19T09:35:00.001-07:00

Mundane, I am not convinced that you exist.
That all moments do not contain magical qualities
dormant until the alchemy of our brains,
that ancient power of humor and sight
turns you pure
smelts the meaning out of this drive home.

-Me, trying to elevate this morning's carpool

Ave Atque Vale

Even though I managed to swerve around the lump
of groundhog lying on its back on the road,
he traveled with me for miles,

a quiet passenger
who passed the time looking out the window
enjoying this new view of the woods

he once hobbled around in,
sleeping all day and foraging at night,
rising sometimes to consult the wind with his snout.

Last night he must have wandered
onto the road, hoping to slip
behind the curtain of soft ferns on the other side.

I see these forms every day
and always hope the next one up ahead
is a shredded tire, a discarded brown coat,

but there they are, assuming
every imaginable pose for death's portrait.
This one I speak of, for example,

the one who rode with me for miles,
reminded me of a small Roman citizen,
with his prosperous belly,

his faint smile,
and his one stiff forearm raised
as if he were still alive, still hailing Caesar.

-Billy Collins

Shout out to the Echo Park Cru, a.k.a. the Brick Haus sale was awesome!

2011-05-16T09:25:00.000-07:00

First, I'd just like to thank L.A. for being the most kooky and randomly amazing place ever. Where else would you get Kate Miss and the neighborhood Cheech & Chong look-a-likes (so drunk they had to hang onto the walls...except Ms. Miss who could stand up pretty good on her own so talented she is!) shopping your pop-up vintage sale?

That is what I call a broad customer base! Corporations would kill for that, and we will sell our marketing secrets to them for a mee-lion dollars.

Actually, the secret is in the sauce. The people sauce, that is.

Morgan was the meek and reclusive star of the show (whose nametag I stole for an hour just to see what it's like to have everyone subtly bending at the waist in a Japenese-style bow when introducing themselves...also not looking directly at my face).

Seriously, how many times did I say, "I know, she is incredibly talented!" yesterday? SO MANY.

This is the best picture I could find of her...she's so secretive!

And then there was Picasso and Eva Peron's granddaughter--raised in exile in the jungles of El Salvador (which is why she knows plants so well)--Bianca of TerriPlanty. She's like a snake charmer with babies, dogs, adults, plants, roving swarms of Africanized bees, whatever. If it's alive, it loves her and does what she says. I am no different.

This is one of her magical terrarium pieces:

Her crafty set-up at Unique LA:

And this is how everyone looked at her pieces--totally, completely enthralled:

And the boyfriend,"Handsome Andy Sandberg" Erick? A total keeper. You hear me Bianca??

Rounding out our Echo Park Cru was famed French photographer/writer/designer Laure Joliet (from HGTV, Apartment Therapy, Dwell, and yo mama!), our deceptively muscular blond project manager. Her uncle, Jack Nicholson, had this to say about her: "Laure is a star! Uncle Jack loves you baby!"

And I'm only slightly exaggerating some of this...because we were in L.A., the normal six degrees of separation from famous people was reduced to like a point three degrees. The air was tingling with famous-ness. Or maybe it was the downed electrical cable laying in the puddle nearby. Hmmm.

SO, a big wet-lipped kiss to the Cru and the gorgeous people who showed up for the sale. Especially the guy in line who yelled, "You said you were opening at noon!" when we tried to go put on deoderant. You, my friend, are a treasure.

It was the most fun I've ever had in a parking lot, and I've been to some damn fine parking lots, sooo...

Were you there? Do you wish you were? And who bought my hippo cookie jar? Can I please buy it back?

p.s.-all photos stolen without written or verbal permission from anyone. Sorry.

The World Without Blogger

2011-05-13T10:22:00.000-07:00

In an uncharacteristically stupid move, the government temporarily disabled Blogger recently to test the effects on society.

And by society of course I mean women.

Men are just changing the oil and shuffling papers around desks to look busy. The government already knows this. They invented it (during Prohibition there was indeed a rise in oil changes and paper-shuffling rates among men. But nothing else changed. Nada. End of social experiment).

Some questions they are trying to answer:

Would workplace productivity go up?
Would houses be cleaner and school bake-sale participation increase (it's a little known fact that bake sales account for 10% of our national GDP--no wonder they are concerned!)
With a few extra minutes on their hands, would the women help the dudes fix the recession/national debt/oil prices?
Can they really trace the decline in school test scores, job creation, and spending at SEARS to the rise in popularity of "A Cup of Jo"?

All these things needed answering, and there was only one way to find out: cripple Blogger and watch what happened.

Only instead, this little experiment has led to epic lifestyle chaos.

How do we make choices if the guiding lights of our socity are suddently shut off?

It's like if in the Olde Days someone took away the Bible, the Farmer's Almanac, insect plagues, and moonshine. No moral compass! No way to determine who is evil! No more spontaneous fiddle dances!

Why, just this morning I saw a poor, bewildered woman walking down the street wearing equal parts Benetton and Esprit. With jelly shoes. She had apparently reverted back to the last time she made a style choice on her own without the help of blogs...1989.

Kiosks selling hair scrunchies have sprouted up at malls seemingly overnight!

And somewhere a once-stylish and confident woman is at Home Depot choosing Navajo White paint and buying fleur de lis drapes at JC Penney. Before this cruel experiment? She would have chosen a color called "Soot" from Fine Paints of Europe's "Places Bombed in WWII" historical collection. And curtains handblocked in India by the slaves/artisan community run be a famous textile designer. And maybe, if she read the edgier blogs, some invisible chairs from Philip Starck's new "Practical Joke" line of furniture.

So please, Nancy Pelosi, end this madness and give us our Blogger back. Cup of Jo is getting cranky. She hasn't washed her striped boatneck French terry Petit Bateau t-shirt in days.
Purchases of fascinators and owl-themed items on Etsy are at a stand-still! Cupcakes and Cashmere is actually trying to make cupcakes! We are forgetting how to spell "lurve" and no one has said "I heart that" since Monday. These important traditions could be lost forever if you don't act quickly.

Thank you.

Lurve, Modernhaus

Things Teens Dread...the parked car conversation

2011-05-12T10:15:00.000-07:00

(alternatively titled "I Give Up, I Can't Write a Blog About Style, Having Finally Admitted to Myself That I Have Very Little Knowledge of this Subject". Should you require style information, this blogger is the way to go. This one is not. Overplucked eyebrows, frosted lipstick, and "athletic" legs in mini-skirts and Forever 21 shoes does not a stylista make...and don't be fooled! There are NO CUPCAKES! I've looked!).

Anyhoo...

There's nothing like being locked into a tightly confined space with a frowny-faced parent to inspire the deepest sense of dread, impending doom, and the imminent loss of some privilege or freedom in a teen.

You remember how this goes, I'm sure of it...close your eyes and think back.

The car rolls up to it's destination even slower than normal, and your mom, (because this is a uniquely mom-move...dads handle the same matters by smacking child on back of head and hollering "Don't be such an idiot!"), your mom is very slowly, very carefully, so as not to alert your teen/animal senses, turning down the stereo with one hand and simultaneously reaching for the automatic door locks with her other hand.

Except your teen/animal senses recognize this maneuver immediately and send you into a deep primal panic.

You want to wail, claw at the windows, send Lassie for help. Because your mom is now turning to you and speaking the eight most terrifying words in the New Revised Teen English Dictionary: "I want to talk to you about something."

Oh. Crap. Teens have died of hunger, grown old while waiting for their moms to finish "talking to them about something"!

So, as a survivor of this kind of torture (I actually spent years 13-16 locked into a Volkswagon Vanagon while my mom "talked to me about something", surviving off of old popcorn kernels I found on the floor and eventually being rescued when an S.O.S. note I scribbled onto a page of the bible was found by a passerby!), I am nothing if not compassionately sensitive to the feelings of my teen children.

I like to think I am not only cooler, but sneakier, by not introducing the talking part with an announcement (thus by-passing the groan and eye-roll!) and just jumping right into it. I do this WHILE the car is still moving and the radio is on. They have no idea what's happening! We are just cruising down the highway when suddenly words like "private parts" and "self-discipline" start coming out of nowhere (my mouth)!

In this way, my children will always associate Arcade Fire with warm talks about perverts, and Green Day songs will always elicit memories of friendly threats of beatings if grades don't improve.

Of course, the dad-method has some value, too. So I try to follow up my sneak attack with a jaunty head-smack and, when they've jumped out of the unlocked car and run with newfound energy towards school, a loud shout out the window, "and don't be an idiot!"

Because how will they develop any character without at least a little public humiliation? It's where I got all mine from, and I'm filled to the brim with character! Thanks mom!

Burl Table, Mid Century Bedroom, Danish Desk, and Suekichi Uchida Chairs

2011-04-29T09:48:00.000-07:00

Shop updates are here!

This black walnut California Modern burl piece is dy-no-mite! A bit hard to capture in photographs...the tones are strange and amazing with black, deep mahogany reds, and even deep purples. The natural edges have the most amazing swirl pattern.

So, I know you can get, like, a fake-y West Elm driftwood-from-Bali side table now. But this is the real "Organic Modern" deal. Handmade by a Northern California artist in the 60s. The wife was probably weaving macrame wall hangings nearby. I see ferns and unfinished pottery scattered about, and wine in Mason jars and lentils for dinner. This piece just oozes Big Sur vibes.

And these are going to freak you out: Chrome. Canvas. Safari style. 1970s. Japan?!?

Yep. Designed by Suekichi Uchida in the 70s, they have the coolest low-slung design with a high back for uber-comfort. Tubular chrome "X" frames with deep wooden arms. Military-grade canvas sling seats. I actually have a total of three chairs and two ottomans, although just one set it listed.

A perfect Danish desk:

And the most rare specimen of vintage furniture: a cool Mid Century bedroom set!

Why are most of them so ugly? With Formica headboards and dreary sadness? Maybe most good designers didn't venture into bedroom furniture? Who knows.

Not only is this set really cool, it's in showroom condition and the bed is King-sized! Heaven knows most post-war folks loved them some tiny double beds. Making a usable Mid Century bed that much harder to find!

Available in the shop now.

....

How to look like an Argentine without even trying

2011-04-23T09:38:00.000-07:00

I am a little in love with this girl--her look and her designs.

I'm ordering this one in Army Green. Seriously, why would you shop at, say, Macy's when you can get a custom dress handmade by a sexy Argentinian girl, for $71??

You can order a standard size, or send her your exact measurements and she'll size it perfectly for you. For someone like me who has a Brazilian's caboose and the chest of an anorexic, that's a revelation.

I love this shirt, too. With cropped skinnies and super-tall platform sandals for my summer uniform.

You know, for all the tango parties I'll be going to. Or Costco shopping trips.

You can find Mia Blaz on Etsy, here.

Welcome Wagon

2011-04-19T14:49:00.000-07:00

Welcome visitors, immigrants, and defectors from the Brick House.
I cannot offer you any of the well-organized, elegantly photographed blog posts and DIY tutorials you get from Morgan. I am neither organized nor elegant, and yet Morgan allows me to be her friend (as long as I keep making those monthly payments...check's in the mail love).

In fact, if the Brick House lost an arm and a leg, went blind in one eye, and was dropped on it's head as a baby, this is pretty much what it would look like. But it has a certain charm, no? Just say yes.

Some(all)of you are here because of this:

It's true. I have been chosen. And like a crazed Price Is Right contestant that has been called up from the audience, I am running to the stage shrieking at my good fortune. It's not every day one gets to collaborate on a hipster pop-up shop at a gallery in L.A. with Morgan Freaking Satterfield.

So come meet us! We are weird. We will stun you with our poor social skills and beautiful furniture! We are waxing, oiling, and sanding in preparation for you. And we are even getting the furniture ready, too!

Morgan will be pouring drinks and spinning records and making gluten free cupcakes (not). I will bring my mustache and hipster food allergies. We will wear Bando heart pins and Tom's slip-ons. We will say "hey" and pretend not to care. Yay us!

California Modern...want this? buy that!

2011-04-16T22:14:00.000-07:00

I was thinking how furniture design mirrors architectural movements, and that it would be fun sometimes to try and find the architectural equivalent (I totally did not spell that correctly the first three tries...) of furniture in the shop.

To me, this house and this Paul Evans-inspired armoire epitomize California Modern; rustic, handmade, artistic, a little bit hippie, yet totally modern.

What do you think? If this armoire was a house, wouldn't it be this one?

This armoire totally wants to go skinnydip in that pool and listen to Cat Stevens right now.

...

Hans Olsen, a Finn Juhl "Chieftan" Chair, and an overused word

2011-04-12T13:52:00.000-07:00

Oh, heh heh....hi there! Man, I really do want to write this blog, despite all evidence to the contrary. But maybe you get it? Family first, business second, and self-expression/professional development through blogging maybe somewhere around #800
on the list of priorities.

But, my grandma said something curious yesterday (and believe me, there's nothing new about that). She said she's getting tired of hearing people say that they're busy. So says the independently wealthy oil baroness. But still, she makes a point. Me thinks I need to accept that "crazy-busy" is the new normal and just get on with it.

On the other hand, the pace of my life is so out of hand right now that I've started forgetting to eat, take showers, and other normal-people behaviors like returning phone calls and trimming toenails. And it makes me feel like a stinky jerk.

So, I'm curious. Working mama-ladies, how do you deal with your priorities so that your relationships and body odor don't suffer (or so that your relationships don't suffer from your body odor)??

Meanwhile, I've been rocking the butt off the vintage market here. Seriously, SO MUCH GOOD STUFF.

Like one of these (really!!!):

And here, finally, are preliminary pictures of that other thing I was telling y'all about:

And a big hot hunk of this:

I will be updating the shop this Thursday evening, so check back if you're interested in these pieces.

Time Lapse

2011-03-25T08:49:00.000-07:00

While I wait for my replacement camera to arrive, I have to share with you the work of photographer Irina Werning. I can't wait to see more of her "Back to the Future" project this summer. The pictures are haunting, sweet, funny, even cautionary.
The last I couldn't resist...it's from another series of her muse/pet Chini. Maybe the best dog portrait ever.

Hans Olsen in the HAUS!

2011-03-22T22:35:00.000-07:00

I shouldn't tell this story. O.K., maybe I'll tell just a little bit. Last week I accidentally ran across a dining set advertised for sale. No pictures, barely any details. Except it mentioned that the chairs fit into "little cut-outs" along the sides of the table. And I thought, "Huh...that sounds a lot like the famous Hans Olsen for Frem Rolje design." But that would be impossible, right?

Ever delusionally hopeful, I sent my houseboy/husband to investigate, giving him orders to "just get it no matter what". I was getting really strong Danish vibes at this point.

Eventually the owner showed up, and the hubs texted me that it was "kind of interesting". And several hours later I was watching an iconic Hans Olsen for Frem Rolje dining set as it was unloaded into the warehouse.

Note to self: always, always go with your gut!

So, it's a rare model. The table expands with a beautiful, integrated butterfly leaf, and there are six four-legged chairs (the more common version, as seen in top two photos, has a fixed small round table and four three-legged chairs).

The best part (besides accidentally finding it)? Instead of black vinyl, it's got bright blue wool upholstery. And it looks ridiculously good against the teak and rosewood.

I'd love to show you actual pictures of my set, but my camera was just involved in a fatal skate-and-run adolescent incident. Sigh. But I suspect I'll have the pieces cleaned and photographed for auction by next week, so check back!

Chestertonfieldville

2011-03-20T23:16:00.000-07:00

Brush up on your Adam Sandler if you're unfamiliar.
Besides being the apex of Winona Ryder's career, this is also how I lovingly refer to Chesterfield sofas. Or just Chester for short. Some of you may have received emails from me titled "OMG THERE'S A BLUE CHESTER FOR $175 GO GET HIM NOW NOW NOW!"

But, never again. You see, I've rented storage space. What I have in mind is that, much as my husband has collected a "quiver" of different surfboards for different water conditions, I will have a Chester for every occasion. Like, one for watching Hoarders on...

You have to get in your car to get to the end of this one. Reportedly from the Nip/Tuck set. Which for some reason always sounds to me like a show about making up beds.

This one's so nice, but very uptight. I like my leather like I like my life; worn out, falling apart, being held up by strong bones and British stalwart-ness.

Slate gray velvet, which I would marry if legal, and I would make a sister-wife out of indigo linen (brass and antique Persians would round out the polygamous household

This Chester belongs to a model and her polo player husband. I know. Don't you just hate it? It thinks it's so great.

And this one is pretty solidly the King of Chestertonfieldville...perfectly aged, striking the right balance between old and hip (I don't relate to this in any way), perfectly patinated brass nailheads.

This was to be the founding Chester in my quiver, but a few episodes of Hoarders later I was mentally prepared to let someone else have him. He is now ensconced in the Brick House, the center of stormy design controversy and the lumpy playground of Iggy and Bowie.

Coming up this week:

brass!!! a burl table the size of an archipelago!!! accidentally finding Hans Olsen!!! will she finish the dining room paint??? MODERNHAUS makes a real furniture purchase over $3.97, and it doesn't have an AMVETS sticker on it!!!

How to Dress for a Gallery Opening

2011-03-09T09:08:00.000-08:00

What I would wear: something weird and slightly intimidating. If you're the artist, you should also bring a bunny rabbit on a leash or carry a live ferret. You'll be famous in no time, guaranteed.

all pieces available from Refinery29, if you've sold a painting and have $2000 lying around

Designing a Dining Room

2011-03-07T10:17:00.000-08:00

Lately I've been a little distracted by the needs of my own house. It gets so little attention, and it's full of business cast-offs and things dumped "temporarily" that have become permanent due to furniture inertia.

Are you familiar with this problem? It's when you put a piece somewhere "for the time being" and it doesn't move for five years.
You know it doesn't work, that you don't even like it, but furniture inertia exerts a force more powerful than the casual decorator can face alone.

It takes an outsider to tell you that your geriatric side has taken over and turned your house into a rest home for retired Martha Stewart paint colors, unwanted credenzas, and an unfortuantely ornate upholstered headboard from the Marquis de Sade's estate sale. No, having a red light district-themed bedroom does not enhance one's marriage. I have proof.

So, I'm in the middle of a slightly manic whole-house redesign/rearrangement. I know there's a window of time here. A very small window before other needs crowd out this project and the furniture exerts its seductive power once again, establishing itself in position for another five years. The time to act is now. I will triumph. The furniture will obey.

Here is a one hour time-lapse of the dining room transformation from this weekend:

"Hi. I have dentures and drive a Lincoln Town Car. I like robin's egg blue, a color briefly popular in 2002, and Waverly drapes from (GASP!!) Bed, Bath & Beyond. I love to look at them when I've fallen and can't get up and I'm waiting for Life Alert to send an ambulance."

"You embarrass me. You can do better than this. For Pete's sake, your fake driver's license says you're only 28. Act your age!"

Add fiddleleaf fig of Jurassic proportions, and rough oatmeal linen drapes. Am I looking any younger yet? What's that you say? Even Martha is embarrassed by this paint color now?

How's this? "Raccoon Fur" by Benjie Moore (a Morgan color recommendation). Alternately referred to as Rat's A** and Coon's Anus.

Better, right?

Next up...Thomas Jefferson called...Monticello wants its dining set back. And maybe make a crazy light fixture. It'll be great.

Ebay Peeping

2011-03-03T16:50:00.000-08:00

Besides the large, very early George Nelson Cigar pendant lamp of yesterday's fame, I'll be listing a Paul Evans-style hand carved Mayan credenza/dresser with matching mirror (it's ethnic, it's chunky, it's perfect!), along with a super-sexy set of six solid teak Danish dining chair. They look so much like Niels O. Moller chairs although they're not. And they have THE BEST original upholstery I've ever seen. It's this very organic-looking woven yellow.
I guess it's ORGANIC MODERNISM week at Modernhaus.
The matching table will be available on Sunday, but I can preview it to you if you're interested.

And, since I quit on you last week, I never did tell you that there are a couple of stellar Paul Mccobb pieces in the shop, as well as some rad "Mid Century Moroccan" side tables and more.
Go to there! See good things!

Eenie Meenie Miney Moe...Vintage Nelson Bubble Lamps

2011-03-02T10:04:00.000-08:00

Some people have suggested that sharing finds like this can engender hatred and jealousy.
So, let me just briefly say that last week I super-accidentally found this trio hanging together in an old house near a country club.

They are "pre-patent" which means they are the earliest of Nelson bubble lamps made.
And in shockingly awesome condition. Save a light layer of dustiness on the very tip tops, they could pass as a few years old instead of fifty plus.

In a rare stroke of generosity to myself, I've decided to keep one and list the others this Thursday.
It's a toss up between "cool weird pumpkin" shape and classic globe.

It would hang here, in the foyer, aka place where kids hang from bannisters, aka apparatus for accessing outdoors and lower floors of house, aka the only room in the house where no one has barfed, aka Hall of Fame, the Boogers Edition.

I think it's going to have to be the globe, since my house is from the Mesozoic Era and can't tolerate a lot of modernity.

What thinks you?

If you're interested in the extra large cigar Nelson or giant pumpkin Nelson, check the shop tomorrow evening, or contact me directly!

P.S., would any of you collectors/afficionados care to weigh in on the name of that middle shape and whether or not it's discontinued? I can't find it anywhere!

Possible Reasons I Haven't Been Blogging

2011-02-28T08:54:00.001-08:00

1. Abducted by aliens that wanted to harvest my mojo.

2. Writing a screenplay about my blogging experience entitled "You Have Zero Comments".

3. Was drinking coffee and sitting in front of the computer all day, so thought I WAS blogging...

4. Shopping trip to Paris, and I bought you ALL gifts!

5. Partying with Charlie Sheen. Wore him out.

6. Yacht shopping in Portofino...didn't find anything I liked.

7. Got lost in the Bermuda Triangle...again.

8. Discovered abandoned warehouse full of Danish furniture. Died of heart failure.

9. Set World's Record for most laundry done in one day.

10.Cut myself on a piece of furniture while working...contracted a rare Danish teak-borne illness. CDC quarantined me in Denmark. Saw a lot of bicycles and cured meats.

DOS COLOR

2011-02-16T10:16:00.000-08:00

I could look at the Dos Family home tours ALL DAY LONG.
I love the way they splice together complementary images. Exquisite.
The Swedes are surprisingly fearless decorators. Do images like this make you want to take more decorating risks?
Do you love color but shy away from using it?
Are your walls...BEIGE by default??

Cellos give me the almost-crieds

2011-02-15T09:44:00.000-08:00

I went to the symphony, okay? I'm on a little bit of a roll with the cultural expeditions.

But seriously, I think I'm onto something here. When most of the women around you are using walkers you really start to feel like a lithe, spry young thing. And hey, when you've been twenty eight for several years like me, that feels good.

Other places to feel like a spring chicken:

The ladies locker room just prior to an "aqua aerobics" class at the public pool. This may also be where you begin to see the wisdom in not getting a tattoo.

Any Denny's or Coco's restaurant, any time, but especially at 4pm. Prime rib, coffee, and a $1 tip anyone?

A medical devices supply store ("Hey, sweet oxygen-tank-on-wheels set-up you got there!")

A stage performance of Shakespeare (not only will you feel young, you'll be the only one awake!)

In line for a flu shot. If you don't have stool softeners, Centrum Silver and laxatives in your cart, you will practically feel like a baby.

So there you go.
If you think you might want to get a little more artsy but you're not in the "major donor plaque on the wall" income bracket, do what I do. Register your email account with your local symphony, opera, theatre, etc., and when they have empty seats at a performance they will send super-discounted offers to you. They're usually at least half-price with a day or two notice. I took my whole family to see Spamalot with $7 tickets!

Do you do any artsy things in your city? Is the crowd as geriatric as it is here, or is it a better mix?

These are things

2011-02-08T10:06:00.000-08:00

not made for trend or profit or notoriety or self-promotion. How often is that the case anymore?

Purely creation for the sake of it. And for the pleasure, maybe. The challenge? Yes, most likely that too.

Dalton Ghetti spends months, sometimes years, on each piece. And he refuses to sell a single one.

An extraordinarily evil thought struck me while reading this article. Say he has a wife. And say one morning without thinking she grabs a pencil to jot down her grocery list.

Later, he walks into the kitchen to find half a year's work lying broken atop a sticky note that reads milk, bread, eggs, pencils.

You can read more about him here.

Opera Lessons

2011-02-07T05:00:00.000-08:00

Friday night some friends and I dropped a wad of cash to see the opera Turandot.

Here is a review of everything but the music.

1. David Hockney can design the poop out of a stage.

2. In San Diego "I'm going to the opera" is synonymous with "I'm going to Disneyland" and "I'm a Midwesterner going to the beach".

Apparently it's ok to wear a Hawaiian beach cover up with a Harry Potter sweater scarf and flipflops.

And if you're old and have bad taste, you're really in luck! You can wear orthopedic sandals with socks and shorts, so no, you are not the Greatest Generation that wore hats and ties and made everything all classy-seeming...you are a Schleppy McShlepper like Hawaiian Harry Potter lady and you should know better. Shame!

3. You can be the hottest (youngest, freshest-smelling, least wrinkled, lowest blood pressured, least likely to be part bionic) girl in the room, if you go to the opera.

4. You shouldn't panic if your friend shows up overdressed in a coat made of Chewbacca fur.

Sure, initially you will walk several feet away, and it will continuously startle your internal "bear alert" mechanism.

But later it will prove to be a good place to lay your head when the opera is still going at 10:45pm. You will dream that you are in Dr. Zhivago sleeping on a pile of Russian bear furs.

5. The real entertainment begins at 11pm, when 8,000 senior citizens are simultaneously released to wander the vast parking structure, like a mutant race of old people zombies, looking for their cars...with one policeman trying to assist them all. I hope they've all made their way home by now. I really do.

So, support The Arts. You can pay hundreds to watch an old guy play a young man singing about China in Italian. Through binoculars.

I'd totally do it again.

Mid Century Leather Safari Chairs and Monumental Danish Teak Cabinet/Dresser

2011-02-04T09:01:00.000-08:00

Fresh cuts in the store now!
Don't even get me started on how this piece can save your marriage with its sexy storage:

or how much these want to hang out on a sheepskin flanking your fireplace...they do. Really bad.

Anyone being fantastic and glamorous this weekend?

I'm going to the opera and then for late night champagne cocktails and croque monsieur at a French restaurant downtown. No bigs.

Oh don't worry, no men were injured in the planning of this evening. Ladeez nite! Maybe I will meet a 100-year old philanthropist geezer that likes redheads. Fingers crossed! Dreams really do come true.

Make Your Own Industrial, Danish, or Antique Furniture

2011-02-02T10:13:00.000-08:00

So, how often do you have a specific furniture design in mind that you can't find ANYWHERE? Or the pieces you DO fall in love with all seem to be in the four-digit range?

Maybe you spend hours on Craigslist or Ebay waiting for just the right piece to come up, and it never does.

Think about making your own. Not from scratch--this isn't the "This Old House" blog. But you can source the basic components of the furniture you want, and assemble the coolest custom pieces.

And believe me, if you can put together that IKEA Billy bookcase, then you can most certainly do this.

If you love industrial chic--things that look like they're from old factories, schoolhouses, and science labs, this is a great site for inspiration. And sticker shock.

Figure out what the basic components are and then source them at Home Depot and Ebay:

These huge, uber-industrial casters are only $30 for a set of four on Ebay!

Add them to some steel shelving, $53 at Home Depot or Amazon. BONUS: it can be assembled horizontally as a workbench. Attach metal casters for an industrial bar cart, desk, or moveable kitchen island.

Or to these pine IKEA shelves that most people use for garage storage (this would look a lot like the first picture, don't you think?)

Or search Ebay or Craigslist for old wooden crates and attach the casters for a rad rolling toy chest, laundry cart, or storage bench seat!

Like the organic-modern vibe? Shockingly cheap to make.

Search "wood slabs" or "burl slabs" on Ebay. Both these pieces were only around $35.

Search "hairpin legs" for the bases. Screw them in.

Depending on the size of your slabs and hairpin legs, you can make anything from a huge dining table, to a long bench, to a pair of little side tables (total projected cost around $70).

Or attach them to a generic dresser for a George Nelson look:

These are the tapered wooden legs I bought to make my son's "Danish" bed. I attached them to the bottom of a captain's bed and painted the whole unit black. Voila-Danish storage bed.

These come in tons of sizes and you can attach them to the bottom of an ottoman, stool, bench, wood slab, or remnant of marble or quartz from a local countertop place.

Search Ebay for old wooden tripod bases, and with around $8 in electrical parts you'll have the most amazing industrial/salvaged/antique floor lamp.

For $2250 less than this one on 1st Dibs!

Want to Anthropolgie-ize an armchair or ottoman, or construct something completely custom?

You just can't fake the patina of real antique legs. These were available (very cheaply, I might add) on Ebay under "wood furniture legs":

Add $8/yard linen from Premier Prints:

And here's some others I loved:

Are your creative juices flowing? What would you consider making?

SOURCES FORTHCOMING!

A San Diego weekend....with teens

2011-01-31T09:24:00.000-08:00

After a Saturday morning of volunteering and trying to avoid jail time by finally getting to my 2009 taxes, I was ready.

Ready to find out what everyone means when they say they can't wait for the weekend.

The radness of having older kids is that "doing family stuff" no longer involves petting zoos that you have to pretend to be all into, or brainless cartoon movies about smart babies and dumb parents. Yay!

What does it involve? A visit to Pablo at Soul Grind to talk about "downhill decks" and "flexing trucks" (if you're new to skate lingo, this is a mother's worst nightmare...it's Tokyo Drift on a skateboard).

This visit should be followed up by a tour of the Children's Hospital "He Wasn't Wearing a Helmet and Now He Has No Face" Unit.

Here's Pablo. If you feel the urge to spill your brains or lose half your skin surface on San Diego pavement, he's your man. The nicest guy ever, and the hero of the Groms.

What next? A lady-like salad for mom? Nope. Epic burritos featured on Man v. Food, from Lucha Libre.

Shrimp, carne asada, avocado, french fries, chipotle sauce. You can call ahead to reserve the gold "winner's" booth! Don't be fooled by the picture-it was jam-packed and you had to pull some Lucha moves to get to the salsa table.

Hat shopping. "You look stupid in that hat." "I'm going to pull down your pants and spank you right here if you talk like that again."

They even gave me 15 minutes in Anthropologie. "Mommmmmmm, are you done yet are you done yet are you done yet?"

Sunday morning an angel brought me the Los Angeles Times and bottomless coffee in bed. And banned children and dogs from the room.

Then everyone got new shoes.

And we took them to the wet beach to break them in.

We checked out some of Dad's super-secret surf spots, which all seem to be named Dead Man's something or other. Why is that?

And in between, I accidentally-on-purpose (I wasn't supposed to be working but it's not work if I'm having fun!)stumbled across some major cool finds...TBA!

Lucha interior by San Diego Daily Photo

DANISH Teak Desk/Wall Unit/Credenza/Dresser/Vanity

2011-01-27T09:49:00.000-08:00

Great Danish designs always remind me of Swiss Army knives, the way they unfold to handle multiple functions.

This gorgeous piece wants to be everything to you. And although such a relationship is never advised between people, with furniture such a thing is possible.

Three large drawers for clothes or office storage, a pull-out desk for writing and laptopping, letter slots for bill-ignoring, and even the sweetest little drop-down mirror to tranform itself into a sexy little dressing table (or for a quick "is there lettuce in my teeth" check).

And it's got great legs to boot. It just might be the best relationship you've ever had.

Available in the shop tonight.